Author Topic: This Just in: From the You Gotta be Shitting Me Dept. (Read 14759 times)

Stoic Joker · « **on:** July 09, 2013, 03:26 PM »

So my brother and I are coming back from the DMV. Our purpose there was to finally get the Tag and Title for a custom Harley Davidson, That I'd started building over 15 years ago. We're talking Thousands of dollars sitting in the back of my pickup truck...

As we're discussing where to go for tag bolts...hardware or auto parts store, I stop at a red light. With the myriad of truly insane (and completely issue free) 90 mph power slides (and etc..) I've done in my truck, I'm being excruciatingly careful due to the current cargo. However...

The mildly brain-dead, complete &*#!*&^$ Airhead behind us doing ~50 mph did not stop (because she was asleep <- direct quote)) ... Until she hit me.

So...sadly, while the bike is okay (yes that is a plus), my truck (2002 Dodge Dakota R/T 5.9 - Translation very fast/very rare) is I suspect totaled. Which pisses me off to no end as -- it's friggin' paid for -- I really liked it.

So here I am playing adventures in frame damage ... And I'm supposed to be on a much needed vacation.

...Can you think of a four letter that starts with F and rimes with truck??

Damn it.

MilesAhead · « **Reply #1 on:** July 09, 2013, 04:14 PM »

I can imagine your frustration. I can remember early one morning my friends and I were returning from a party. The owner of the car was wasted so he let another of us do the driving. I was in the back seat of this small station wagon. We are sitting at a red light. Behind us comes this drunk. Fortunately he was only doing about 30 MPH. Because my foot got forced by the impact, through a gap at the bottom of the front seat. It took me like 5 minutes of struggle to get my foot free. (If the car was on fire that would have entailed some serious sadness.) But what took the cake was, the drunken driver opens his door, staggers to the driver's side window of our car, leans in and says "Hey! Wassa' Matta' wit' ya'?? Didn't ya' see me comin' ?

Yup! It was all our fault for sitting at the red light. We shoulda' ran the damn thing. After all, "nobody else" was out on the road.

Tinman57 · « **Reply #2 on:** July 09, 2013, 04:43 PM »

One option, if it's a rare truck, you can buy the truck from the insurance company for dirt cheap and have it put on a frame straightener.

Stoic Joker · « **Reply #3 on:** July 09, 2013, 05:41 PM »

But what took the cake was, the drunken driver opens his door, staggers to the driver's side window of our car, leans in and says "Hey! Wassa' Matta' wit' ya'?? Didn't ya' see me comin' ?
-MilesAhead (July 09, 2013, 04:14 PM)

Oh dear...that would have gotten him "damaged" if he'd been the one that hit me today.

One option, if it's a rare truck, you can buy the truck from the insurance company for dirt cheap and have it put on a frame straightener.
-Tinman57 (July 09, 2013, 04:43 PM)

At this point I just have to wait for the 25th to take it into the appointment the insurance company (Geico (incredibly not fast)) set up. Then it's fate will be decided (close race).

My favorite part of the ensuing discussion thus far was when the insurance lady -- Who had already been informed that I had stopped at a traffic light, and the person behind me...did not -- asked me if "I was hit in the rear from behind"? (after a short pause) I simply responded with "I really don't think there's another way of doing it".

wraith808 · « **Reply #4 on:** July 09, 2013, 05:43 PM »

^ Well, you didn't damage your sarcastic wit, it appears

Tinman57 · « **Reply #5 on:** July 09, 2013, 06:59 PM »

But what took the cake was, the drunken driver opens his door, staggers to the driver's side window of our car, leans in and says "Hey! Wassa' Matta' wit' ya'?? Didn't ya' see me comin' ?
-MilesAhead (July 09, 2013, 04:14 PM)

Oh dear...that would have gotten him "damaged" if he'd been the one that hit me today.

One option, if it's a rare truck, you can buy the truck from the insurance company for dirt cheap and have it put on a frame straightener.
-Tinman57 (July 09, 2013, 04:43 PM)

At this point I just have to wait for the 25th to take it into the appointment the insurance company (Geico (incredibly not fast)) set up. Then it's fate will be decided (close race).

My favorite part of the ensuing discussion thus far was when the insurance lady -- Who had already been informed that I had stopped at a traffic light, and the person behind me...did not -- asked me if "I was hit in the rear from behind"? (after a short pause) I simply responded with "I really don't think there's another way of doing it".
-Stoic Joker (July 09, 2013, 05:41 PM)

According to all of Gecko's commercials (about 80 times a day), they have the best customer support of all the insurance companies. Of course they don't tell you that only applies when they're opening a new account.....

mwb1100 · « **Reply #6 on:** July 09, 2013, 07:31 PM »

At this point I just have to wait for the 25th to take it into the appointment the insurance company (Geico (incredibly not fast)) set up. Then it's fate will be decided (close race).
-Stoic Joker (July 09, 2013, 05:41 PM)

More than two weeks for the insurance company to look at it?? That's crazy.

wraith808 · « **Reply #7 on:** July 09, 2013, 08:00 PM »

According to all of Gecko's commercials (about 80 times a day), they have the best customer support of all the insurance companies. Of course they don't tell you that only applies when they're opening a new account.....
-Tinman57 (July 09, 2013, 06:59 PM)

Actually I have geico. My wife recently totalled the car, and the customer service was stellar. And the one time that it wasn't, I called and asked to speak to a manager. He rectified the situation immediately.

Not sure what's going on in SJ's case... but I'd ask to speak to a manager and see about getting an earlier appointment if it was me.

Stoic Joker · « **Reply #8 on:** July 10, 2013, 12:46 PM »

According to all of Gecko's commercials (about 80 times a day), they have the best customer support of all the insurance companies. Of course they don't tell you that only applies when they're opening a new account.....
-Tinman57 (July 09, 2013, 06:59 PM)

Actually I have geico. My wife recently totalled the car, and the customer service was stellar. And the one time that it wasn't, I called and asked to speak to a manager. He rectified the situation immediately.
-wraith808 (July 09, 2013, 08:00 PM)

The did much better a few years ago when the wife's care got totaled (she too was rear-ended, but by a guy that was awake with faulty breaks (and no insurance)). The handled that one acceptable but not lightening fast. For fast service I recall Progressives performance; the agent got there before the cops did, assessed the damage, generated an estimate...and cut us a check on the spot. Now that was stellar service in my book.

...Answer to next obvious question is we switched due to price/budget constraints. *Sigh*

Not sure what's going on in SJ's case... but I'd ask to speak to a manager and see about getting an earlier appointment if it was me.
-wraith808 (July 09, 2013, 08:00 PM)

While it had crossed my mind, I'd rather take the time to get under the truck and do my own assessment regarding what the options are. I suspect that one of the "Crumple Zones" that are built into the frame may have given way (as it's designed to) causing the alignment anomaly. As I'm in no hurry to part with the truck I plan to use the time to do some research on how best to argue (assuming I have a leg to stand on) on its behalf if the decision is made to total it.

Stoic Joker · « **Reply #9 on:** July 10, 2013, 12:52 PM »

At this point I just have to wait for the 25th to take it into the appointment the insurance company (Geico (incredibly not fast)) set up. Then it's fate will be decided (close race).
-Stoic Joker (July 09, 2013, 05:41 PM)

More than two weeks for the insurance company to look at it?? That's crazy.
-mwb1100 (July 09, 2013, 07:31 PM)

Well... It's been pouring rain here for the last month, and Florida being a "Transient State" means nobody seems to remember how the hell they're supposed to drive on wet pavement (e.g. pay friggin attention as frequent panic stops are bad..). So after a month's worth of playing bumper cars ... It really is quite likely that they are quite legitimately a bit backed up these days.

skwire · « **Reply #10 on:** July 10, 2013, 01:13 PM »

...Can you think of a four letter that starts with F and rimes with truck??
-Stoic Joker (July 09, 2013, 03:26 PM)

Firetruck?

wraith808 · « **Reply #11 on:** July 10, 2013, 01:15 PM »

I was thinking FlamingDuck!

cranioscopical · « **Reply #12 on:** July 10, 2013, 01:23 PM »

Airhead behind us doing ~50 mph did not stop
-Stoic Joker (July 09, 2013, 03:26 PM)

Really sorry to hear about your truck. Same sort of thing happened to a favourite car of mine. The excuse from the driver who spoilt my ride was "I was trying to get the lid off of my coffee cup." <sigh>

Stoic Joker · « **Reply #13 on:** July 10, 2013, 01:56 PM »

Airhead behind us doing ~50 mph did not stop
-Stoic Joker (July 09, 2013, 03:26 PM)
Really sorry to hear about your truck. Same sort of thing happened to a favourite car of mine. The excuse from the driver who spoilt my ride was "I was trying to get the lid off of my coffee cup." <sigh>
-cranioscopical (July 10, 2013, 01:23 PM)

Strangely, the thing that aggravates me the most is that when I got out of the truck in a state of mind perilously close to livid. I saw that the other driver was a scrawny 20 something blond girl that was already crying hysterically. Giving me no opportunity (as there is no profit in attacking something that pathetic) to share my feelings regarding their latest display of a complete lack of driving aptitude.

Shades · « **Reply #14 on:** July 10, 2013, 08:29 PM »

i can relate to that feeling, yesrs ago i was driving in a military car doing a rather large postal run. While waiting for a traffic light, benind two other cars, a truck pulling a tank with 20.000 liter of milk though the traffic light was green. My car took the real beating, the two cars in front of me were totalled as well. And everyone involved were practically ignoring me during the form filling. Even the military police did this, making me wait for 1.5h it took for somebody from my base could pick me up. The wreck of the car i was driving was treated better than me.

cranioscopical · « **Reply #15 on:** July 11, 2013, 05:49 AM »

While waiting for a traffic light, benind two other cars, a truck pulling a tank with 20.000 liter of milk though the traffic light was green. My car took the real beating…
-Shades (July 10, 2013, 08:29 PM)

No use crying over spilt milk!

Spoiler

Sorry!
Well, a bit anyway.

40hz · « **Reply #16 on:** July 11, 2013, 07:23 AM »

Cars can be repaired or junked.

Bodies either heal - or they don't.

Sorry about what happened. But knowing how you feel since I've been hit by idiots a few times myself, you still got the better part of the bargain.

My younger sister wasn't so lucky. She spent a year and a half in traction after the car she was a passenger in got nailed by a drunk driver. She's now the proud owner of an 18 inch hunk of cobalt/titanium alloy in her right thighbone. And eight more inches of it in her shin. Lots of fun boarding airliners with that installed despite the "special ID card" they give you to let the TSA and airlines know you can't help but set off a metal detector.

I'm just glad you didn't get hurt. Onward!

Tinman57 · « **Reply #17 on:** July 12, 2013, 06:18 PM »

I rear ended a car on a highway at night back when I was 17, the guy was backing up with his headlights off on a curve whilst drinking his beer. It was my fault. Why you ask?

At the time, in Louisiana, if you rear-end someone it's automatically your fault, and it was also legal to drink and drive..... It totalled my beautiful car too......

Stoic Joker · « **Reply #18 on:** July 12, 2013, 06:57 PM »

I rear ended a car on a highway at night back when I was 17, the guy was backing up with his headlights off on a curve whilst drinking his beer. It was my fault. Why you ask?

At the time, in Louisiana, if you rear-end someone it's automatically your fault, and it was also legal to drink and drive..... It totalled my beautiful car too......
-Tinman57 (July 12, 2013, 06:18 PM)

Ouch, that's a tricky one really ...Because backing up on a highway is also equally illegal. Most likely the fact that you were moving...and 17 were why the cop went that way.

Years ago the wife and I were going to see friends out a whining back road. We got stuck behind a school bus that as usual wasn't in a hurry. Available passing lanes being few, short and far between...I was indeed riding their ass like a $2 whore, especially as we approached the nearest passing zone. Then the bus decided to stop...in the middle of nowhere...for no apparently intelligent reason.

I also stopped.

All was fine.

Then the bus driver put the bus in reverse...and ran right the f*** over my ass! (or more specifically my cherry 91 V8 Mustang that would happily do 140 mph)

When the FL Highway patrol got there, the bus driver as whining about me tailgating her slow ass (that liked to ride the line in passing zones to make it impossible to safely pass...). However the trouper decided to side with me when it was explained that at the point (in time) of contact...I was stopped...and she was in reverse ... Which is apparently a real no-no based on the look of shocked horror on the troopers face when I got to that part of the story.

So... The county had to fix my car, and foot the bill for a rental car which I took great glee in torturing half to death. Ever wonder what'll happen if you throw a car on reverse at 50 mph??? LOL ...It's a hell of a ride I'll tell ya that much.

tomos · « **Reply #19 on:** July 14, 2013, 12:05 PM »

Ever wonder what'll happen if you throw a car on reverse at 50 mph???
-Stoic Joker (July 12, 2013, 06:57 PM)

Ouch

and yes, LOL

Stoic Joker · « **Reply #20 on:** July 14, 2013, 12:59 PM »

Ever wonder what'll happen if you throw a car on reverse at 50 mph???
-Stoic Joker (July 12, 2013, 06:57 PM)

Ouch
and yes, LOL
-tomos (July 14, 2013, 12:05 PM)

Well... This is one of the few (if not only) areas where front wheel drive cars are way more fun that rear wheel drive cars. You see rear wheel drive cars are considerable more "directionally stable" which I accidentally verified when my dog decided to stumble across the shifter (shoving the car in reverse) in a Camaro we had at (once again) about 50 mph. Outside of a rather huge and quite confusing cloud of tire smoke...nothing exciting really happened.

However...

(back story) The wife (girlfriend at the time) and I were sitting at a bar... (isn't always how these stories start..) ...Watching a Pontiac commercial on the bar TV. The commercial depicted a bunch of guys in lab coats and clipboards standing around a car with smoke pouring off the tires, as a sub frame showed a gear selector being switched back and forth between drive and reverse. The point of the commercial was to demonstrate just how incredible "bullet proof" the new line of Pontiac cars transmissions really were.

As fate would have it, the commercial had drawn our attention away from the conversation we were just having about just how pathetically gutless the (at the time) brand new "Sport Model" front wheel drive Pontiac Grand Am rental car we'd been stuck with was.

One really must understand at this point that the various comments I've made in the past about having shit for impulse control are not an exaggeration...

We looked at each other and instantly and wordlessly agreed that truth in advertising be due-ly and diligently vetted post haste ... And so departed on said holy quest to the nearest large paved area...which just so happened to be a church parking lot.

While the transmission did hold together, the engine slammed against the firewall as the car rather violently spun around to change vehicle attitude to match the drivelines new directional intent. We spent the better part of an hour verifying our findings, before the sound of sirens in the distance caused prudence to end the proceedings.

...This is quite likely one of the fondest memories I have.

tomos · « **Reply #21 on:** July 14, 2013, 01:46 PM »

...This is quite likely one of the fondest memories I have.
-Stoic Joker (July 14, 2013, 12:59 PM)

wraith808 · « **Reply #22 on:** July 14, 2013, 01:52 PM »

While the transmission did hold together, the engine slammed against the firewall as the car rather violently spun around to change vehicle attitude to match the drivelines new directional intent. We spent the better part of an hour verifying our findings, before the sound of sirens in the distance caused prudence to end the proceedings.

...This is quite likely one of the fondest memories I have.
-Stoic Joker (July 14, 2013, 12:59 PM)

Ok... I have to ask. Was the car still driveable? I take it that it was since you used it in your getaway?

Stoic Joker · « **Reply #23 on:** July 14, 2013, 03:05 PM »

While the transmission did hold together, the engine slammed against the firewall as the car rather violently spun around to change vehicle attitude to match the drivelines new directional intent. We spent the better part of an hour verifying our findings, before the sound of sirens in the distance caused prudence to end the proceedings.

...This is quite likely one of the fondest memories I have.
-Stoic Joker (July 14, 2013, 12:59 PM)

Ok... I have to ask. Was the car still driveable? I take it that it was since you used it in your getaway?
-wraith808 (July 14, 2013, 01:52 PM)

Despite all efforts to the contrary ... It was indeed still drivable (if not a tad worse for ware). It also stalwartly survived much other abuse in the interest of science/curiosity/psychosis... Which is why Pontiac got my truth in advertising award for that year.

wraith808 · « **Reply #24 on:** July 14, 2013, 05:56 PM »

Despite all efforts to the contrary ... It was indeed still drivable (if not a tad worse for ware). It also stalwartly survived much other abuse in the interest of science/curiosity/psychosis... Which is why Pontiac got my truth in advertising award for that year.
-Stoic Joker (July 14, 2013, 03:05 PM)

... inquiring minds want to know...