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Author Topic: How to stop worrying  (Read 9617 times)

justice

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How to stop worrying
« on: September 10, 2007, 07:12 AM »
Maybe a bit of an unusual topic but I just read this article.

http://www.anxietyculture.com/worry.htm
There's a useful gimmick to help stop worrying (we've already mentioned it briefly in How to Avoid Responsibilities, but it's worth looking at in detail). You simply cultivate the habit of postponing worrying. Your mind becomes (re-)conditioned to not dwell on worries in the present.
As someone who'd like to worry less, the trick mentioned seems worth trying. Do you worry a lot and what helps you?

justice

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Re: How to stop worrying
« Reply #1 on: September 10, 2007, 07:16 AM »
The whole site is actually worth a look with a very interesting looking newsletters, articles on responsibilities and a Diary of Distractinos, which must appeal to you procastinators :)

(Anxiety Culture is a satirical webzine containing a wealth of gimmicks, ideas and images for navigating the Anxiety Age. We peek at the paranoias hidden behind the respectable suburban front door...)
« Last Edit: September 10, 2007, 07:29 AM by justice »

Darwin

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Re: How to stop worrying
« Reply #2 on: September 10, 2007, 07:27 AM »
Thanks for the link, justice. Definitely a look - I'm a notorious worry-wart!

lanux128

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Re: How to stop worrying
« Reply #3 on: September 10, 2007, 08:33 AM »
i haven't read the article you've linked but i read somewhere that procastinating may hold off the immediate anxiety attack but will snowball into a stressful burden on your brain.. :) now, if only i can remember who wrote that, was it David Allen in GTD?


justice

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Re: How to stop worrying
« Reply #4 on: September 10, 2007, 08:37 AM »
It's a bit of a one-tip page, so putting the whole tip here would rob you from a great online resource but basically they're applying a gtd methodology (writing down on a list 'takes it out of your thoughts') to worries.

lanux128

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Re: How to stop worrying
« Reply #5 on: September 10, 2007, 08:45 AM »
now that i've read the article, i realise that they're using the gtd technique.. in the book, David Allen prescribed writing a "some day, maybe" list to keep all the not-so important, niggling tasks out of one's frontal lobe.. anyway, good link, justice.. :up:

nudone

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Re: How to stop worrying
« Reply #6 on: September 10, 2007, 11:21 AM »
i 'worry' about whether this kind of thing can work.

consciously you have removed or shifted the thing that is worrying you. subconsciously you have done nothing at all, well, you have performed an action not unlike performing a ritual or token gesture (maybe that is enough for the subconscious to be satisfied).

do these conscious gestures resonate with the subconscious part of the mind - the subject you are worrying over is still there, consciously ignoring it but perhaps subconsciously fretting over it until the stress manifests itself in either physical or psychological problems.

i find myself worrying over things, sometimes real concerns, sometimes trivial things that are exaggerated because the larger concerns seem sated, i.e. the big worry hole needs to be filled with something even to the point of inventing a problem to fill it.

personally, i've found that being occupied with an activity you need to give full attention to will remove the problem of worrying about something. (oh, this is just being distracted isn't it - we all do it - i thought i was going to say something profound.) i think the point i'm trying to make is that if you are occupied you'll stop worrying about the trivial problems - they cease to be an issue and you realise they really weren't important. the other point i'd like to make is that i think, by nature, the human mind will find things to worry about or become annoyed about or become stressed about even when life is running perfectly smooth.

it's like we have a worry quota or a stress box that needs to keep topping itself up - if there isn't a real problem to satisfy it the brain will invent one as a substitute. the level of worry or stress or no less real just because the problem is a fabricated one.

probably stated the obvious there - which i'll apologize for.

edit:
just wanted to add that the 'worry/stress' thing i'm talking about is the kind that lingers in the back of your mind all day long, every day, all week, all month, all year - not the type of worry that you believe you'll make a fool of yourself at a particular moment in time like a public speaking event. though, i guess, they could well be the same thing.
« Last Edit: September 10, 2007, 11:27 AM by nudone »

wuwei23

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Re: How to stop worrying
« Reply #7 on: September 26, 2007, 07:36 PM »
i 'worry' about whether this kind of thing can work.

consciously you have removed or shifted the thing that is worrying you. subconsciously you have done nothing at all, well, you have performed an action not unlike performing a ritual or token gesture (maybe that is enough for the subconscious to be satisfied).

At least with the GTD approach, writing everything down is only the start of the process. You need to have an established review system as well - one that you totally trust - in order to be able to stop worrying about what you need to do. If you can't rely on it to remind you at the right time, then the worry will creep back in.

Writing lists is easy, staying committed to regular reviews is a lot harder (for me, at least). That's generally where my process starts to fall apart :)

app103

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Re: How to stop worrying
« Reply #8 on: October 05, 2007, 10:39 PM »
The only way I am going to stop worrying (or worry less) is if other people do it for me...or should I say, do their own fair share of worrying that they are supposed to be doing, so I don't have to do it for them.

tomos

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Re: How to stop worrying
« Reply #9 on: October 06, 2007, 06:43 AM »
The only way I am going to stop worrying (or worry less) is if other people do it for me...or should I say, do their own fair share of worrying that they are supposed to be doing, so I don't have to do it for them.

i have the experience that if i worry (too much) for/about other people
that they sort of sit back & think along the lines -
oh that's okay, I don't have to worry about it /look after it [+ the subconcious bit: cause tom will ]
unfortunately it can be a bit of a circular situation that can be hard to break out of
[...says he right in the middle of one such... :D]
Tom

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Re: How to stop worrying
« Reply #10 on: October 06, 2007, 10:30 AM »
Oh c'mon!

The answer to "Don't Worry" is "Be Happy!" :D

Everyone knows that! ;)
Slow Down Music - Where I commit thought crimes...

Freedom is the right to be wrong, not the right to do wrong. - John Diefenbaker

cranioscopical

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Re: How to stop worrying
« Reply #11 on: October 06, 2007, 11:31 AM »
The only way I am going to stop worrying (or worry less) is if other people do it for me...or should I say, do their own fair share of worrying that they are supposed to be doing, so I don't have to do it for them.

There speaks a parent!  :)