Author Topic: FUNNY~! Drinking Water DOES NOT Hydrate! (Read 32707 times)

jgpaiva · « **Reply #25 on:** November 22, 2011, 04:58 AM »

Unless Coca Cola can make matching health claims on their product, they don't want anyone else to state the obvious. To claim that water can prevent or treat dehydration on the packaging of your product is to say that water is better for you than sugar-loaded soda pop...

And we can't have that, because people will start drinking water instead of soda pop, and Coca Cola will unfairly suffer an economic loss.
-app103 (November 22, 2011, 01:38 AM)

Actually, from what I understand, soft drinks makers have already taken advantage of this by saying that "Water is the major component of all soft drinks."

40hz · « **Reply #26 on:** November 22, 2011, 05:37 AM »

Hmm, does this means next up they will ban sport car advertisers from advertising that it helps attract girls?
-capitalH (November 22, 2011, 03:49 AM)

You mean it doesn't????

Well...then how do you explain this:

Renegade · « **Reply #27 on:** November 22, 2011, 06:20 AM »

Unless Coca Cola can make matching health claims on their product, they don't want anyone else to state the obvious. To claim that water can prevent or treat dehydration on the packaging of your product is to say that water is better for you than sugar-loaded soda pop...

And we can't have that, because people will start drinking water instead of soda pop, and Coca Cola will unfairly suffer an economic loss.
-app103 (November 22, 2011, 01:38 AM)

I'm not sure I believe that conspiracy theory, since Coca-Cola actually owns at least one bottled water company.

How's this for scary? List of Coca-Cola brands^w
-Deozaan (November 22, 2011, 03:47 AM)

I saw a documentary where a Coca-Cola marketing spokesperson said something to the effect that water is the enemy, unless they can sell it. I forget exactly... But whatever -- they're simply scary. She went on at length about how they target people with ads. They have a lot in common with Joseph Goebbels, including ethics or lack thereof.

Renegade · « **Reply #28 on:** November 22, 2011, 06:27 AM »

Unless Coca Cola can make matching health claims on their product, they don't want anyone else to state the obvious. To claim that water can prevent or treat dehydration on the packaging of your product is to say that water is better for you than sugar-loaded soda pop...

And we can't have that, because people will start drinking water instead of soda pop, and Coca Cola will unfairly suffer an economic loss.
-app103 (November 22, 2011, 01:38 AM)
Actually, from what I understand, soft drinks makers have already taken advantage of this by saying that "Water is the major component of all soft drinks."
-jgpaiva (November 22, 2011, 04:58 AM)

Dehydration can reduce mental and physical performance but the wide range of soft drinks available means that it is easy, convenient and enjoyable to drink enough to stay properly hydrated.

Hey, I have a pill that contains chronic toxins that with prolonged use will cause you serious damage, but they're not acute toxins, so you'll have no immediate effects from them. Heck, they even taste good. So why not pop a few with a glass of water. You can hydrate that way! Water is good for you. So drink water with my poison that I'll sell to you for a reasonable price and you'll stay hydrated!

Oh god... Am I having a nightmare? Is this world really, truly, seriously that ****ed up?

Somebody... please wake me up...

Renegade · « **Reply #29 on:** November 22, 2011, 06:34 AM »

In other news, our water purifier came and is all hooked up and running.

BACK STORY:

My wife wanted a new kettle to boil water for her tea, so we went out and bought a nice one with a glass body.

Upon filling it, we noticed that the tap water was significantly yellow (not visible in a normal glass though).

So, I found what seemed to be a reputable company that was knowledgeable on the topic, had good filters, and bought one.

I swore off buying bottled water (if at all possible) a while back after doing some reading and seeing a couple documentaries on the topic.

This was one of them:

I'll still buy a bottle of water before I buy sugary soft drinks though, unless I can get it for free of course. e.g. You're out for the day and thirsty, etc. After bottle 1 though, it's time to refill it at the tap!

capitalH · « **Reply #30 on:** November 22, 2011, 06:39 AM »

Hmm, does this means next up they will ban sport car advertisers from advertising that it helps attract girls?
-capitalH (November 22, 2011, 03:49 AM)

You mean it doesn't????

Well...then how do you explain this:
(see attachment in previous post)

-40hz (November 22, 2011, 05:37 AM)

Hey I never said it doesn't. All I said it cannot be conclusively proven. Money, appearance, personality, clothing etc can also attract girls, and until we know what exactly attracts girls to which extent, I propose that we ban advertisements claiming that their product is the best method for attracting girls.

f0dder · « **Reply #31 on:** November 22, 2011, 03:17 PM »

And something like this should NEVER have a claim attached to it intended to try to fool the public into thinking that it is healthy and good for you!
-app103 (November 22, 2011, 01:38 AM)

That looks PERFECTLY healthy to me. Mental health rather than physical health, though

Renegade · « **Reply #32 on:** November 22, 2011, 09:59 PM »

And something like this should NEVER have a claim attached to it intended to try to fool the public into thinking that it is healthy and good for you!
-app103 (November 22, 2011, 01:38 AM)
That looks PERFECTLY healthy to me. Mental health rather than physical health, though
-f0dder (November 22, 2011, 03:17 PM)

Mental Health! Yeah~! \oo/

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app103 · « **Reply #33 on:** November 23, 2011, 08:58 AM »

Unless Coca Cola can make matching health claims on their product, they don't want anyone else to state the obvious. To claim that water can prevent or treat dehydration on the packaging of your product is to say that water is better for you than sugar-loaded soda pop...

And we can't have that, because people will start drinking water instead of soda pop, and Coca Cola will unfairly suffer an economic loss.
-app103 (November 22, 2011, 01:38 AM)

I'm not sure I believe that conspiracy theory, since Coca-Cola actually owns at least one bottled water company.

How's this for scary? List of Coca-Cola brands^w
-Deozaan (November 22, 2011, 03:47 AM)

I didn't mean for it to sound like a conspiracy theory, at all. I only meant to explain the fairness and logic of the decision to disallow bottled water producers from making health claims, thereby leading consumers to believe that only water or only bottled water, or only their bottled water can do what they claim.

Stoic Joker · « **Reply #34 on:** November 23, 2011, 11:50 AM »

If people are actually sitting around waiting for the legislature to either confirm or deny that water is wet ... society is doomed.

Years ago we had a lake house with a well. The well was rather close to a lake that - due to a string of dry seasons - was in the process of drying up. Water quality, was not, "stellar"...

A sales monkey (for a water softener company) calls me to offer a "free" (Yeah, Right...) water quality test. After much back and forth while she tried everything to get me to bite ... She said there wasn't any way that I as a consumer could really know what the current water quality was. I said: Really?!? I got a glass of it in my hand right now and it's f***ing green... Now I don't think I really need a lab kit to tell me that sucks...Now do I?!?

She hung up.

Deozaan · « **Reply #35 on:** November 23, 2011, 03:07 PM »

Here's another one I don't understand:

Britain's 'cheapest' lunchtime meal was unveiled by scientists on Wednesday - the toast sandwich.

The Royal Society of Chemistry (RSC) is reviving the mid-Victorian dish, which, unsurprisingly, consists of two slices of bread around a slice of toast.

[...]

The RSC's Dr John Emsley said: "You simply put a piece of dry toast between two slices of bread and butter, with salt and pepper to taste. I've tried it and it's surprisingly nice to eat and quite filling.

"I would emphasise that toast sandwiches are also good at saving you calories as well as money, provided you only have one toast sandwich for lunch and nothing else."
-http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-15752918

What. The. Smurf.

This is wrong on so many levels. Why does it take scientists to announce/discover that you can eat toasted bread in between non-toasted bread to save some money? Who is funding this "scientific research"? Maybe if they didn't fund this kind of useless science they could afford to eat more than a toast sandwich for lunch. . .

Renegade · « **Reply #36 on:** November 23, 2011, 06:49 PM »

Here's another one I don't understand:

Britain's 'cheapest' lunchtime meal was unveiled by scientists on Wednesday - the toast sandwich.

The Royal Society of Chemistry (RSC) is reviving the mid-Victorian dish, which, unsurprisingly, consists of two slices of bread around a slice of toast.

[...]

The RSC's Dr John Emsley said: "You simply put a piece of dry toast between two slices of bread and butter, with salt and pepper to taste. I've tried it and it's surprisingly nice to eat and quite filling.

"I would emphasise that toast sandwiches are also good at saving you calories as well as money, provided you only have one toast sandwich for lunch and nothing else."
-http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-15752918

What. The. Smurf.

This is wrong on so many levels. Why does it take scientists to announce/discover that you can eat toasted bread in between non-toasted bread to save some money? Who is funding this "scientific research"? Maybe if they didn't fund this kind of useless science they could afford to eat more than a toast sandwich for lunch. . .
-Deozaan (November 23, 2011, 03:07 PM)

The society is so confident in the repast, it will offer £200 to anyone who can create a cheaper alternative.

OH OH OH~! I have it~! I want that £200~!

The Suibbal Sucker~!

What is it? Well, you eat your finger! It costs you nothing! Zero! Just stick your finger in your mouth, like a sucker, and start chewing. Kind of half suicide, and half cannibal. Suibbal!

Now, this is a bit of a problem for quadriplegics and people with no arms or hands or fingers, but they aren't left out! They can have... wait for it...

The Lipibbal Sandwich~!

What is it? Well, you eat your lips! It costs you nothing! Zero! Just stick your lips between your teeth like a sandwich, and start chewing. Kind of half lip (top or bottom according to taste), and half cannibal. Lipibbal!

Man... These guys should hire me!

Ahem...

Let them eat cake.

Deozaan · « **Reply #37 on:** November 23, 2011, 07:16 PM »

Here's a cheaper alternative: Half a toast sandwich! Make one and cut it in half. Now you can eat for two meals instead of just one. Or if you're really hungry you can have two (halves) for lunch!

Or yet another: A bread sandwich. Save the cost of electricity and a toaster by not toasting the middle slice of bread. Also, leave off the butter and salt and pepper.

Now gimme that £200!

Renegade · « **Reply #38 on:** November 23, 2011, 08:42 PM »

Here's a cheaper alternative: Half a toast sandwich! Make one and cut it in half. Now you can eat for two meals instead of just one. Or if you're really hungry you can have two (halves) for lunch!

Or yet another: A bread sandwich. Save the cost of electricity and a toaster by not toasting the middle slice of bread. Also, leave off the butter and salt and pepper.

Now gimme that £200!
-Deozaan (November 23, 2011, 07:16 PM)

Just take 1 slice and fold it in half! What a deal! An entire meal!~ Something the whole family can enjoy~!

Deozaan · « **Reply #39 on:** November 24, 2011, 11:23 AM »

Something the whole family can ~~enjoy~~ force down~!
-Renegade (November 23, 2011, 08:42 PM)

Fixed that for you.

f0dder · « **Reply #40 on:** November 24, 2011, 03:07 PM »

Even cheaper?

Go dumpster surfing

tomos · « **Reply #41 on:** November 24, 2011, 03:47 PM »

Even cheaper?

Go dumpster surfing
-f0dder (November 24, 2011, 03:07 PM)

watched a video lately about a guy living without money (somewhere near Bristol I think). Him & friends got mostly organic stuff out of the supermarket-skips. He said they didnt reduce it to sell it off cause they wanted to keep the prices up, so they dumped it instead...
So, good advice there f0dder ;-)

f0dder · « **Reply #42 on:** November 24, 2011, 03:53 PM »

Even cheaper?

Go dumpster surfing
-f0dder (November 24, 2011, 03:07 PM)
watched a video lately about a guy living without money (somewhere near Bristol I think). Him & friends got mostly organic stuff out of the supermarket-skips. He said they didnt reduce it to sell it off cause they wanted to keep the prices up, so they dumped it instead...
So, good advice there f0dder ;-)
-tomos (November 24, 2011, 03:47 PM)

I personally wouldn't do it (at least not with my current financial situation

), there's the risk of contamination, and that stuff isn't always visible, smellable or tastable.

That said, a lot of perfectly good food (and other items) are thrown away - stuff usually lasts well beyond expiry dates (but obviously can't be sold then), stuff is thrown away if the packaging is too badly bruised (zomg what would the customers think!), et cetera.

In .dk dumpster surfing isn't illegal, as long as you don't break&enter.

Renegade · « **Reply #43 on:** November 24, 2011, 04:14 PM »

Oh god... How easily crack-pot science sends everything into a downward spiral...

Dumpster surfing isn't illegal? Jeez... Can we possibly sink any lower?

f0dder · « **Reply #44 on:** November 24, 2011, 04:29 PM »

Dumpster surfing isn't illegal? Jeez... Can we possibly sink any lower?
-Renegade (November 24, 2011, 04:14 PM)

It'd probably be below my dignity, but still - there is a lot of perfectly good products being thrown out, and it's sad that there's so much waste. At least a few businesses here and there have the ethics to donate to shelters and whatnot.

tomos · « **Reply #45 on:** November 25, 2011, 05:12 AM »

I have no plans to go dumpster surfing in the foreseeable future either

Spend a lot on food actually, but never buy water (veering vaguely direction topic) the tap water here is good (and OMG, it hydrates!)