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Living Room / Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Last post by IainB on November 14, 2013, 02:25 PM »I recall that in my co-ed grammar school in the UK, they used to have "extra-curricular" studies for the children to take/choose, except there was little choice and it boiled down to mandatory gender-based assumption - the boys took "woodwork" and the girls took "domestic science" (cooking).But just sayin' ... the days when they could put comments like that in textbooks, before they were marketing-spinned to death!Well, I guess that is an indication of how out-of-touch I am with the "Modern World" ... Because I see nothing wrong with the comment what so ever. Then again, I also do not consider political science to be a real science either.
____________________-TaoPhoenix (November 14, 2013, 10:58 AM)
____________________-Stoic Joker (November 14, 2013, 11:27 AM)
Being a budding and very keen scientist and astronomer at the time, I was confuzzled and never could understand where the word "science" actually came into the equation and wondered whether they should call the other thing "woodworking science".
By that age, one of my constant companions was my Pocket Oxford Dictionary, which would've had something similar to this:
(Source: 10th ed. of the Concise Oxford Dictionary.)
science
· n.
1 the intellectual and practical activity encompassing the systematic study of the structure and behaviour of the physical and natural world through observation and experiment.
2 a systematically organized body of knowledge on any subject.
3 archaic knowledge.
– ORIGIN ME: from OFr., from L. scientia, from scire ‘know’.
_______________________
Here's a joke about physics, which is one of the exact sciences:
Green bananas.
This bloke is working on the buses and collecting tickets. He rings the bell for the driver to set off when there's a woman half getting on the bus. The driver sets off, the woman falls from the bus and is killed.
At the trial the bloke is sent down for murder and seeing as its Texas he's sent to the electric chair. On the day of his execution he's sat in the chair and the executioner grants him a final wish.
"Well," says the man, "is that your packed lunch over there?"
"Yes." answers the executioner.
"Can I have that green banana?" the man asks.
The executioner gives the man his green banana and waits until he's eaten it. When the man's finished, the executioner flips the switch sending hundreds of thousands of volts through the man. When the smoke clears the man is still alive. The executioner can't believe it.
"Can I go?" the man asks.
"I suppose so." says the executioner, "That's never happened before."
The man leaves and eventually gets his job back on the buses selling tickets. Again he rings the bell for the driver to go when people are still getting on. A man falls under the wheels and is killed. The bloke is sent down for murder again, and sent to the electric chair. The executioner is determined to do it right this time so he rigs the chair up to the electricity grid for the whole of Texas. The bloke is again sat in the chair.
"What is your final wish?" asks the executioner.
"Can I have that green banana in your packed lunch?" says the condemned man.
The executioner sighs and reluctantly gives up his banana. The bloke eats the banana all up and the executioner flips the switch. Millions of volts course through the chair blacking out Texas. When the smoke clears the man is still there smiling in the chair. The executioner can't believe it and lets the man go.
Well, would you believe, the bloke gets his job back on the buses. Once again he rings the bell whilst passengers are still getting on, this time killing three of them. He is sent to the electric chair again. The executioner rigs up the chair to the entire American national grid, determined to get his man this time. The man sits down in the chair smiling.
"What's your final wish?" asks the executioner.
"Well," says the man, "can I have that green banana out of your packed lunch?"
The executioner hands over his banana and the man eats it all, skin included. The executioner then pulls the handle and a zillion million trillion volts go through the chair. When the smoke rises the man is still sat there alive without even a burn mark.
"I give up." says the executioner, "I don't understand. How can you still be alive after all that?" and he strokes his chin thoughtfully, adding, "It's something to do with eating those green bananas isn't it?" he asks.
"Nah." says the bloke, "I'm just a really bad conductor."