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Author Topic: I hate Valentine's Day!  (Read 12418 times)
zridling
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« on: January 20, 2010, 09:37:52 PM »

I'm married and I hate it simply for the commercial pressure to conform to a Hallmark-born holiday and arbitrarily spend money expressing the same care/love for my wife that I share daily.



But if you're single, it really stinks. Because you get bombarded with all the junk that goes with it that day. There's got to be a better way to ignore or convert this day into something less manipulative. Suggestions?
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Perry Mowbray
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« Reply #1 on: January 20, 2010, 09:46:17 PM »

I love Valentine's day because it reminds me that I'm about to get a Calendar reminder about my wedding anniversary in 7 days  Wink

I believe that the day pre-existed what we have today and has since been converted into the marketing extravaganza that we now enjoy (not).
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Stoic Joker
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« Reply #2 on: January 21, 2010, 06:04:16 AM »

I'm with you Z! ...But luckily my wife gave up on me years ago, so I'm off the hook as it passes by unnoticed.
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cranioscopical
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« Reply #3 on: January 21, 2010, 07:52:49 AM »

One could inject a mild element of danger with which to enliven the day.

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Chris
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Yar.

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« Reply #4 on: January 21, 2010, 07:58:55 AM »

Honestly, I don't even see the commercial crap. I love my wife of 18 years, and always try to find something unique.  Last year I had a Barbershop Quartet sing to her at work.  I think a holiday is what you make it, and the only reason commercialism intrudes is if one lets it or is concerned with it.  I do not let it, care not about commercial garbage. Find something local and unique to let your loved one know you love him/her/it.

My wife has just been told she most likely has cancer, so they are even more important to me now.  Remember that folks, you never know, so make them all count.

http://www.y0himba.net/20...-that-there-is-no-god.php

Besides, if you do it right, there is always http://www.steakandbjday.com/ (NSFW-ish)
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mouser
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« Reply #5 on: January 21, 2010, 09:22:34 AM »

Hang in there y0himba and wife, our thoughts are with you.
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zridling
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« Reply #6 on: January 21, 2010, 11:10:44 AM »

Exactly, y0himba, but I don't need a corporation telling me to go buy something from them as a substitute for my feelings. I can express those anytime and how many times I want, without their guilt-sanctioned reminders that if I don't do something special on that particular day, I'm the bad guy.
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« Reply #7 on: January 22, 2010, 06:31:46 PM »

But if you're single, it really stinks. Because you get bombarded with all the junk that goes with it that day. There's got to be a better way to ignore or convert this day into something less manipulative. Suggestions?

If you're single, consider this:
One year, while browsing the Valentine's Day cards in the drug store, I realized that they make these cards for everyone. Parents, kids, grandparents, friends, in-laws, you name it. So, I started sending my mom & my sister's husband's dad Valentine's Day cards. I'd buy special pens & big fancy cards for them & make a whole big thing of it. I'd sit down and really take my time, and write in them how much I loved them, and why. They loved getting these cards!! More than birthday cards, Christmas cards or any other cards. I could hear it in their voices when they called to say thanks.

Don't be sad...you can change it from a lover's day to a loving day and really take (and give) pleasure in doing so.
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-Sarah
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« Reply #8 on: January 22, 2010, 07:04:41 PM »

Exactly, y0himba, but I don't need a corporation telling me to go buy something from them as a substitute for my feelings. I can express those anytime and how many times I want, without their guilt-sanctioned reminders that if I don't do something special on that particular day, I'm the bad guy.

Valentine's Day really does mean nothing to some people. Many people share your opinion.
As long as both people feel the same way, that's great.

But, if it means anything to a loved one, even if it's only because of stupid social pressures, who cares about commercialism or corporate greed?

In my twenties & thirties, I watched flowers being delivered to my co-workers. Year after year.
But I never once got flowers or a card from my former long-time boyfriend. He cared more about the evils of Hallmark than my feelings.
He knew how much I would have appreciated just a simple card, not to mention flowers, like the other girls at work.
But, it was the whole day he resented, and he just couldn't seem to get past it. Weak.
I guess he loved me, but this was not a good example of it.

If you don't like Valentine's Day, but your loved one does, a selfless, loving gesture would be to drop your politics, give them a little something (flowers, card, whatever) & make their day. You might even end up getting a special surprise, too  Wink .
Granted, it is on the day you may be expected to show love, but other than that, I don't see any harm in it smiley
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-Sarah
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« Reply #9 on: January 22, 2010, 07:08:16 PM »

Quote
If you don't like Valentine's Day, but your loved one does, a selfless, loving gesture would be to drop your politics, give them a little something (flowers, card, whatever) & make their day.

nicely said.  thumbs up
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Carol Haynes
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« Reply #10 on: January 22, 2010, 07:19:10 PM »

How about a day for sad and depressed singles?

It all really annoys me - Christmas (nothing to do with Christianity), Easter (all about bunnies and eggs for some reason), Valentines Day (aka commercial and sick making crap day), Mothers Day (bastardised regligious day), Fathers Day ('cos mothers had one and Dad's felt left out).

When's my F*****G day?

Actually did you know that "Mother's Day" was nothing to do with mothers at all originally - Hallmark invented the current format. Originally Mother's Day was called Mothering Sunday and referred to people returning to the church where they were baptised and grew up (ie. returning to their mother church). See http://www.bbc.co.uk/reli...s/motheringsunday_1.shtml for details.
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scancode
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« Reply #11 on: January 22, 2010, 07:26:47 PM »

How about a day for sad and depressed singles?

I'd buy love that. Please visit my website at http://www.sadanddepresedsinglesdating.com/
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Perry Mowbray
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« Reply #12 on: January 22, 2010, 08:06:51 PM »

If you don't like Valentine's Day, but your loved one does, a selfless, loving gesture would be to drop your politics, give them a little something (flowers, card, whatever) & make their day. 

I really liked the idea of the Barber-Shop Quartet smiley

One of the things we learned fairly late in life, was that the object was to share yourself and one of the best ways to do that is to share your feelings (as they are uniquely yours); and you're right, it doesn't matter what container they come in, just as long as they are in there and they are received.
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Carol Haynes
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« Reply #13 on: January 23, 2010, 04:39:01 AM »

I'd buy love that. Please visit my website at http://www.sadanddepresedsinglesdating.com/

Bugger - you got me!
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scancode
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« Reply #14 on: January 23, 2010, 08:47:10 AM »

I'd buy love that. Please visit my website at http://www.sadanddepresedsinglesdating.com/

Bugger - you got me!

:-D

Now that I think about it, making such a website is not a bad idea :-]
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zridling
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« Reply #15 on: January 23, 2010, 08:51:42 AM »

Carol has outed me, so I'll come clean. I simply dislike all holidays. I don't even like Christmas! (Though I will acknowledge Festivus.) There are just too many for every role that a person has. Guess I should lighten up.  cheesy
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Darwin
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« Reply #16 on: January 23, 2010, 01:36:55 PM »

Easter (all about bunnies and eggs for some reason)

Wonder no more, Carol!

Quote
Why do we associate chicks and eggs with church doctrine? Why do we color Easter eggs and arrange them carefully in Easter baskets? We're glad you asked.
The Easter holiday dates back to a pagan holiday called Ostara, a holiday dedicated to the Anglo-Saxon goddess of spring and fertility. Over time, language changes changed the spelling (and pronunciation) from Ostara to Easter. Legend has it that Ostara, wanting to please some children, changed her pet bird into a rabbit; the rabbit then laid colored eggs for the children. The children wove birds' nests out of grass and put the colored eggs inside. Then, the children continued the ritual yearly, thinking that having colored eggs in the baskets brought good luck.

Finally, I've found another use for the practice reading comprehension passages in the SSAT Prep Book that I use with my students!
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Darwin
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« Reply #17 on: January 23, 2010, 01:46:14 PM »

How about a day for sad and depressed singles?

It all really annoys me - Christmas (nothing to do with Christianity), Easter (all about bunnies and eggs for some reason), Valentines Day (aka commercial and sick making crap day), Mothers Day (bastardised regligious day), Fathers Day ('cos mothers had one and Dad's felt left out).

When's my F*****G day?

In South Korea they cater to everyone, they have Red day (Feb. 14), White day (March 14) and Black Day (April 14):

Red day: guys take gals they like out
White day: gals take guys they like out
Black day: those who were not asked out go out and eat Chajang-myun, which is Korean-Chinese food (black bean sauce with vegetables over noodles).

I've probably bungled that a bit, but that's the essence, anyway...
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« Reply #18 on: January 24, 2010, 03:45:35 AM »


I lived in US (New England) for a year with an american family - on valentines day they made cards (no bought cards!) for parents & grandparents (& possibly for friends as well - it was years ago so no longer 100% sure) - I thought it was really nice & presumed it was typical for over there, but reading this thread that doesn't seem to be the case...
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Tom
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« Reply #19 on: January 24, 2010, 08:44:58 AM »

I lived in US (New England) for a year with an american family - on valentines day they made cards (no bought cards!) for parents & grandparents (& possibly for friends as well - it was years ago so no longer 100% sure) - I thought it was really nice & presumed it was typical for over there, but reading this thread that doesn't seem to be the case...

Can't speak for the US... Oh crap, who am I kidding? I can - we're inundated with American advertising and television - ANY holiday, on either side of the border, is crass, commercial, devoid of its original context... Valentine's cards, candy, and advertising were in the stores here (western Canada) by the first week of January. The two biggies, though, are Christmas and Easter.
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« Reply #20 on: January 27, 2010, 01:00:03 PM »

I lived in US (New England) for a year with an american family - on valentines day they made cards (no bought cards!) for parents & grandparents (& possibly for friends as well - it was years ago so no longer 100% sure) - I thought it was really nice & presumed it was typical for over there, but reading this thread that doesn't seem to be the case...

Maybe not as typical as it used to be. But it's still like that for a lot of us. I still make my own Valentine's Day cards. I can't buy ones that say what mine do! <*wink*>.

ANY holiday, on either side of the border, is crass, commercial, devoid of its original context...

Only if you let it be that way. One good thing about being as inundated with adverts as we are in the US is that most of us are immune to it by now. It's more like hearing the sound of cicadas on a warm night rather than an ongoing annoyance for many of us.

Carol has outed me, so I'll come clean. I simply dislike all holidays. I don't even like Christmas!

That's pretty scary! Should I give Cindy Loo Who your phone number so she can talk to you? Grin

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Carol Haynes
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« Reply #21 on: January 27, 2010, 07:18:23 PM »

That's pretty scary! Should I give Cindy Loo Who your phone number so she can talk to you? Grin

Has she got a brother for me  Kiss
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« Reply #22 on: January 28, 2010, 10:14:21 PM »

13th February = Normal Restaurant prices, - 14th Feb, bloody expensive...be like me, go out 1 day before or 1 day after if your wife REALLY wants to, but dont leave the house on the 14th unless you have to work, and even then, avoid having to purchase anything other than a pack of smokes and a bottle of water lol
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« Reply #23 on: February 09, 2010, 05:59:07 PM »

I don't mind the day much, the advertising and pushing of all the stuff is a bit annoying at times, but not too bad. For the guys that otherwise never do anything to show affection, IMO it is a good 'holiday', but a waste for the rest. What is annoying is when the Christmas ads come on before Halloween...

I guess I'm a lucky geek, met someone online (yes, an online, long-distance relationship... don't judge me tongue) and it's working out great with the exception of gifts (our parents don't know). For my birthday he got me a copy of Lumines with the Advanced Pack, and a month later we spent all of Christmas Eve and the majority of Christmas together (via Skype), and now for his birthday (the 10th) and Valentines I bought him a barking Valentines 'Be Mine' stuffed doggie with a plush-sized bouquet of roses to go with it smiley

It has its positive and negative aspects, but is still a good time to show the people who you care about, how much you do Kiss
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« Reply #24 on: February 09, 2010, 06:29:53 PM »

Love does not become better when it comes on TV, on the radio and all around teh interwebz. BUY FLOWERS! BUY MORE FLOWERS! MOOOORRRE!
I'm so happy that I'm single...
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