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Last post Author Topic: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]  (Read 1435606 times)

wraith808

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2525 on: January 15, 2014, 10:58:00 PM »
36 White People That Need To Be Stopped

Some highlights...



Woman modeling a dress made out of cheese.  Yes, you read that right.  But that's not the worst thing.



... I don't have the words.

And there's more!  Too much more...   :huh:

But I leave you with an image too disturbing to ignore... the family portrait.


x16wda

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2526 on: January 16, 2014, 05:35:41 AM »
... the family portrait.

Anybody have one of those memory pens like in Men In Black that I might borrow?
vi vi vi - editor of the beast

Arizona Hot

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2527 on: January 17, 2014, 07:58:13 PM »
Woman modeling a dress made out of cheese.

It could be worse. She could say the cheese is for the office party. Would you want some of that(as macaroni & cheese)?

It will never become popular, it isn't washable!
« Last Edit: January 17, 2014, 08:34:00 PM by Arizona Hot »

Arizona Hot

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2528 on: January 17, 2014, 08:06:57 PM »
Clipboard.jpgsilly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]

What does your handwriting say about your personality?

barney

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2529 on: January 17, 2014, 08:31:02 PM »
(see attachment in previous post)
What does your handwriting say about your personality?

Hey!  They omitted arthritis, amongst other physicals  :P.  That infographic reminds me of a Freudian statement on smoking:  if you smoke, you were weaned too early  :o; if you don't smoke, you were weaned too late  :huh:.  Seemingly no one was ever weaned at the right time  :-\ :P.

Deozaan

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2530 on: January 18, 2014, 12:20:39 PM »
Looks like bunk to me. I pretty much never write a letter the same way twice. (e.g., sometimes my Os are open, sometimes they're closed.) I can't be bothered to get a certain style down.

And other than writing a check or jotting down a few things on a sticky note (usually numbers; for programming), I'm not sure when was the last time I really wrote anything in my own hand (not counting typing). . . :-\


Renegade

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2531 on: January 18, 2014, 12:31:54 PM »
(see attachment in previous post)
What does your handwriting say about your personality?

Hey!  They omitted arthritis, amongst other physicals  :P.  That infographic reminds me of a Freudian statement on smoking:  if you smoke, you were weaned too early  :o; if you don't smoke, you were weaned too late  :huh:.  Seemingly no one was ever weaned at the right time  :-\ :P.

Yep. Got nerve damage on my thumb, and my writing is a total disaster now. Not that it wasn't a disaster before... :P
Slow Down Music - Where I commit thought crimes...

Freedom is the right to be wrong, not the right to do wrong. - John Diefenbaker

wraith808

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2532 on: January 18, 2014, 04:33:37 PM »
Yep. Got nerve damage on my thumb, and my writing is a total disaster now. Not that it wasn't a disaster before...

How are you recovering from that, anyway?

wraith808

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2533 on: January 18, 2014, 04:34:18 PM »
It will never become popular, it isn't washable!

What about edible underwear?

Deozaan

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2534 on: January 19, 2014, 01:58:39 AM »
It will never become popular, it isn't washable!

What about edible underwear?

Ah, but the fashion-wise (and cheese connoisseurs) know that when it gets old enough, it will turn bleu.


barney

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2535 on: January 19, 2014, 02:05:27 AM »
Ah, but the fashion-wise (and cheese connoisseurs) know that when it gets old enough, it will turn bleu.

So?  What do you have against bleu cheese?  Kinda like it, myself, although that looked a lot like Velveeta slices  ;).

x16wda

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2536 on: January 19, 2014, 08:48:25 AM »
So?  What do you have against bleu cheese?  Kinda like it, myself, although that looked a lot like Velveeta slices  ;).

Ah!  That explains this.
vi vi vi - editor of the beast

Target

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2537 on: January 19, 2014, 04:26:37 PM »
cheese or not, did you notice the kraftmanship?

Shades

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2538 on: January 19, 2014, 05:21:15 PM »
She Cheddar's in her boots.

wraith808

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2539 on: January 19, 2014, 05:52:44 PM »
Well, it could get a bit more embarrassing than usual if she cuts the cheese, I'd say.

Target

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2540 on: January 19, 2014, 06:48:36 PM »
Well, it could get a bit more embarrassing than usual if she cuts the cheese, I'd say.

gouda one...(sorry, couldn't resist :-[)

puts a new slant on 'singles' too I'd warrant

IainB

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2541 on: January 19, 2014, 09:15:09 PM »
Well, it could get a bit more embarrassing than usual if she cuts the cheese, I'd say.
gouda one...(sorry, couldn't resist :-[)
puts a new slant on 'singles' too I'd warrant
Oh! Bad pun. That's the sort of thang my mates Cam an' Bert like to come out with.

IainB

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2542 on: January 19, 2014, 09:20:52 PM »
Assorted groaners.

The Grim Reaper came for me last night, and I beat him off with a vacuum cleaner.  Talk about Dyson with death.

I went to the cemetery yesterday to lay some flowers on a grave.  As I was standing there I noticed 4 grave diggers walking about with a coffin, 3 hours later and they're still walking about with it.  I thought to myself, they've lost the plot!!

My daughter asked me for a pet spider for her birthday, so I went to our local pet shop and they were £70!!!  Blow this, I thought, I can get one cheaper off the web.

I was at an ATM yesterday when a little old lady asked if I could check her balance, so I pushed her over.

I start a new job in Seoul next week.  I thought it was a good Korea move.

Statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarves are not Happy.

My neighbour knocked on my door at 2:30am this morning, can you believe that, 2:30am?!  Luckily for him I was still up playing my Bagpipes.

Paddy says "Mick, I'm thinking of buying a Labrador .  ”Bugger that” says Mick "have you seen how many of their owners go blind?"

Man calls 999 and says "I think my wife is dead" The operator says how do you know?  He says "The sex is the same but the ironing is building up!"

I was in bed with a blind girl last night and she said that I had the biggest pen#s she had ever laid her hands on.  I said "You're pulling my leg!"

I saw a poor old lady fall over today on the ice!!  At least I presume she was poor - she only had £1.20 in her purse.

My girlfriend thinks that I'm a stalker.  Well, she's not exactly my girlfriend yet.

I woke up last night to find the ghost of Gloria Gaynor standing at the foot of my bed.  At first I was afraid….  then I was petrified.

A wife says to her husband you're always pushing me around and talking behind my back.  He says what do you expect?  You're in a wheelchair.

I was explaining to my wife last night that when you die you get reincarnated but must come back as a different creature.  She said "I would like to come back as a cow".  I said you're obviously not listening.

The wife was counting all the 1p's and 2p's out on the kitchen table when she suddenly got very angry and started shouting and crying for no reason.  I thought to myself, "She's going through the change."

When I was in the pub I heard a couple of plonkers saying that they wouldn’t feel safe on an aircraft if they knew the pilot was a woman.  What a pair of sexists.  I mean, it's not as if she'd have to reverse the bloody thing!

Local Police hunting the 'knitting needle nutter’, who has stabbed six people in the arse in the last 48 hours, believe the attacker could be following some kind of pattern.

Bought some 'rocket salad' yesterday but it went off before I could eat it!

A teddy bear is working on a building site.  He goes for a tea break and when he returns he notices his pick has been stolen.  The bear is angry and reports the theft to the foreman.  The foreman grins at the bear and says "Oh, I forgot to tell you, today's the day the teddy bears have their pick nicked."

Murphy says to Paddy "What ya talkin to an envelope for?" "I'm sending a voicemail ya thick sod!"

Just got back from my mate's funeral.  He died after being hit on the head with a tennis ball.  It was a lovely service.

19 paddies go to the cinema, the ticket lady asks "Why so many of you?" Mick replies, "The film said 18 or over."

An Asian fellow has moved in next door.  He has travelled the world, swum with sharks, wrestled bears and climbed the highest mountain.  It came as no surprise to learn his name was Bindair Dundat.

tomos

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2543 on: January 20, 2014, 02:04:21 AM »
^a couple of good laughs there - in spite of the groaner theme (Gloria Gainer's ghost lol)
Tom

wraith808

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2544 on: January 20, 2014, 06:44:54 PM »
superbowl.jpg

A "joint meeting"

IainB

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2545 on: January 22, 2014, 03:04:51 AM »
Some more puns.

How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it....
 
Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!
 
A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.
 
I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
 
Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.
 
England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.
 
I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.
 
They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Type-O.
 
I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.
 
Jokes about German sausages are the wurst.
 
I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid, but he says he can stop any time.
 
I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, and then it dawned on me.
 
This girl said she recognised me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.
 
When chemists die, apparently they barium.
 
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.
 
I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.
 
I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
 
Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?
 
When you get a bladder infection you know urine trouble.
 
Broken pencils are pretty much pointless.
 
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
 
I dropped out of the Communism class because of lousy Marx.
 
All the toilets in New York's police stations have been stolen. As of now, it appears the police have nothing to go on.
 
I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
 
Velcro - what a rip off!

Arizona Hot

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Deozaan

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2547 on: January 23, 2014, 04:23:27 AM »
The question is, do they taste real?


barney

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2548 on: January 23, 2014, 04:34:39 AM »
^Uh-h-h ... how would ya know?  Taste test?????

Arizona Hot

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #2549 on: January 23, 2014, 10:44:11 AM »
Quote
Who Came Up with Pullet Surprise?
The author Amsel Greene wrote the book entitled, "Pullet Surprises" in 1969 in which she writes her observations of the writing blunders of the students in her English classes of 30 years. She had been documenting her students' strange gaffes and had been searching for the perfect word for them. A student of one of her fellow teachers had written this in an essay: "In 1957, Eugene O'Neill won a Pullet Surprise." Greene had what she called a "eureka" moment and decided that "Pullet Surprise" was the perfect descriptor of these writing bloopers.

No, a pullet surprise is why you never hear about chicken journalism.