A: The answer to San Francisco's recent oil spillhttp://www.60seconds...-home-grown.php#more
Apparently what you've suspected all your life is correct: you're using the wrong hair conditioner. No, wait, that's not it... here it is. Apparently human hair has tremendous
abilities to soak up oil, due to its scaly cracked nature.
So the clever citizens of San Francisco, California are deploying 2000 1x1 foot mats of human hair, all harvested from sleeping homeless people. No, wait... harvested from... it really doesn't say. But anyway, they're deploying the mats and cleaning up the spill, then tossing them into the world's largest dumpster or something.
No wait, here it is... they take the discarded mats and seed them with fungi, which eats the organics and leaves behind rich, fertile soil. No, I am not making this up: tragic oil spill --> giant floating mats of human hair --> fertile top soil.
Which they'll use to grow corn to convert into biodiesel and the Circle of Life will be complete.