That's what SHE said. Fucking period.

Oh f#ck.

Perhaps one of the most versatile, interesting and colourful words in the English language today is the word "f#ck".  The "F" word.  It is the one magical word which, just by its sound, can describe pain, pleasure, love, and hate.  Grammatically, "f#ck" falls into many grammatical categories.  It can be used as a verb, both transitive (John f#cked Mary) and intransitive (Mary was f#cked by John).  It can be an action verb (John really gives a f#ck), a passive verb (Mary really doesn't give a f#ck), an adverb (Mary is f#cking interested in John), or as a noun (Mary is a terrific f#ck).  It can also be used as an adjective (Mary is f#cking beautiful) or an interjection (F#ck!  I'm late for my date with Mary), and in the interrogative (What the f#ck is Mary doing?).  It can even be used as a conjunction (Mary is easy, f#ck, she's also stupid).  As you can see, there are very few words with the overall versatility of the word "f#ck".

Aside from its s#xu#l connotations, this incredible word can be used to describe many emotions and situations, for example:

Aggression: "F#ck YOU!"
Apathy: "Who really gives a f#ck, anyhow?"
Confusion: "What the f#ck?"
Denial: "I didn't f#cking do it."
Derision: "He f#cks up everything."
Despair: "F#cked again!"
Difficulty: "I don't understand this f#cking business!"
Directions: "F#ck off."
Disbelief: "UNF#CKINGBELIEVABLE!", or "How the f#ck did you do that?"
Disgust: "F#ck me."
Displeasure: "What the f#ck is going on here?"
Fraud: "I got f#cked by the car dealer."
Greetings: "How the f#ck are ya?"
Lost: "Where the f#ck are we."
Panic: "Let's get the f#ck out of here."
Perplexity: "I know f#ck all about it."
Pleasure: "I f#cking couldn't be happier."
Resignation: "Oh, f#ck it!"
Retaliation: "Up your f#cking #ss!"
Suspicion: "Who the f#ck are you?"
Trouble: "Oh-oh! I guess I'm f#cked now."

It can be used in an anatomical description - "He's a f#cking #ssh#le."
It can be used to tell time - "It's five f#cking thirty."
It can be used in business - "How did I wind up with this f#cking job?"
It can be maternal - "Motherf#cker."
It can be political - "F#ck Dan Quayle!"

Once it was slang, but now the use of the F word by many notable people at key points in history has vindicated the everyday us of this word.
For example:

"What the f#ck was that?"
  - Mayor of Hiroshima, 1945.

"Look at all those f#cking Indians!"
  - General Custer, 1877.

"Where the f#ck is all this water coming from?"
  - Captain of the Titanic.

"That's not a real f#cking gun."
  - John Lennon.

"Who's gonna f#cking find out?"
  - Richard Nixon.

"Aw c'mon. Who the f#ck is going to find out?"
- Bill Clinton, 1999.

"Heads are going to f#cking roll."
  - Anne Boleyn.

"Let the f#cking woman drive."
  - Commander of Space Shuttle Challenger.

"What f#cking map?"
  - Mark Thatcher.

"Any f#cking idiot could understand that."
  - Albert Einstein, 1938.

"It does so f#cking look like her!"
  - Picasso, 1926.

"How the f#ck did you work that out?"
  - Pythagoras, 126 BC.

"You want what on the f#cking ceiling?"
  - Michaelangelo, 1566.

"F#ck a d#ck."
  - Walt Disney.

"Why?- Because its f#cking there!"
  - Edmund Hilary.

"I don't suppose its gonna f#cking rain?"
  - Joan of Arc.

"Scattered f#cking showers my arse."
  - Noah, 4314BC.

"I need this parade like I need a f#cking hole in the head."
  - John F. Kennedy, 1963.

"Where the f#ck are we now?"
  - Columbus.

"Where the f#ck are we?"
  - Amelia Earhart, 1937.

"Geez, I didn't think they'd get this f#cking mad!"
- Sadaam Hussein, 2003.
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eating banana.

licking the spoon.

cutting the sausage.

buying cucumber.