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Last post Author Topic: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]  (Read 5,847,927 times)

Arizona Hot

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #4825 on: November 10, 2015, 01:42 AM »
You might want to look for what Mark Passio has to say on solipcism. Interesting stuff.

@Renegade: Thank you. I will pass the video along.
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Arizona Hot

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #4826 on: November 10, 2015, 01:44 AM »
As Black Friday nears, tech deals appear.jpg

As Black Friday nears, tech deals appear

Black Friday deals aren't silly. But what people do to get them can be.

Obsessive Christmas Disorder.jpg

Obsessive Christmas Disorder
"If you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to be a horrible warning"  - Catherine Aird
« Last Edit: November 12, 2015, 07:57 AM by Arizona Hot »

Arizona Hot

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Target

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #4828 on: November 12, 2015, 09:33 PM »
or for those who are more 'hands on'...

Alcohol is photoshop, bottled
Askhole - someone who ask for advice, then ignores it
"Look wise, say nothing, and grunt. Speech was given to conceal thought" - Sir William Osler

Renegade

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #4829 on: November 13, 2015, 11:45 PM »
Cripes... this V8 chainsaw thing is apparently a "thing"!


More out there! :O
Slow Down Music - Where I commit thought crimes...

Freedom is the right to be wrong, not the right to do wrong. - John Diefenbaker

Arizona Hot

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #4830 on: November 14, 2015, 04:32 PM »
I think a mugger using a V8 chainsaw is overkill unless the person being mugged is Batman.
"If you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to be a horrible warning"  - Catherine Aird

Arizona Hot

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #4831 on: November 14, 2015, 05:53 PM »
Did you get even on National Odd Day yesterday?(11/13/15)  Did you wear a green shirt and purple pants? Did you feel inside-out at 17:19:21?
"If you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to be a horrible warning"  - Catherine Aird

Arizona Hot

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #4832 on: November 15, 2015, 02:26 AM »
You might want to look for what Mark Passio has to say on solipcism. Interesting stuff.

But if you are interested in satire, investigate the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

Flying Spaghetti Monster - Wikipedia

Pastafarian gets to wear strainer on head in license photo.jpg

Pastafarian gets to wear strainer on head in license photo

"If you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to be a horrible warning"  - Catherine Aird
« Last Edit: November 15, 2015, 02:48 AM by Arizona Hot »

Edvard

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #4833 on: November 15, 2015, 02:49 AM »
All children left unattended will be given a mocha and a puppy.

Renegade

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Slow Down Music - Where I commit thought crimes...

Freedom is the right to be wrong, not the right to do wrong. - John Diefenbaker

40hz

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #4835 on: November 16, 2015, 09:30 PM »
[attach=#]

mouser

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #4836 on: November 16, 2015, 09:35 PM »
;D ;D ;D

IainB

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #4837 on: November 17, 2015, 08:53 AM »
Silly jokes/puns...
  • I used to be a banker, but I lost interest.
  • I wasn't intending to get a brain transplant, but then I changed my mind.
  • Did you hear about the man who got hit by a can full of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink.
  • Did you hear about the man in the London Underground who got hit by a train and lost the left half of his body? They say he's alright now.
  • I just looked up the word 'apocalypse' in the dictionary. It was quite a revelation.
  • Don't worry about the world coming to an end in the US today. It is already tomorrow in Australia.
  • "An adventure? Alpaca my bags."
  • How did I escape from Iraq? Iran.
  • He ate so much over the holidays that he decided to quit cold turkey.
  • Did you hear the one about Sodium Hydrobromide? NaH BrO.
  • Some gamblers are always looking for a pair-a-dice.
  • Where does bad light end up? In prism.
  • Why can't you trust atoms? They make up everything.

MilesAhead

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #4838 on: November 17, 2015, 03:01 PM »
I wasn't intending to get a brain transplant, but then I changed my mind.

I considered having a cardiac transplant, but my heart wasn't in it.

Arizona Hot

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4wd

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #4840 on: November 18, 2015, 03:16 AM »
  • Don't worry about the world coming to an end in the US today. It is already tomorrow in Australia.

Wait ... how did you get this post out?

These 34 Photos Are So Perfectly Timed, They Seem Impossible.

nvm, just the overly paranoid ref settings I'm using screwing things up.
"I will not follow where the path may lead, but I will go where there is no path, and I will leave a trail." - Muriel Strode, 1903
« Last Edit: November 18, 2015, 03:23 AM by 4wd »

Renegade

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #4841 on: November 18, 2015, 03:52 AM »
NSFW - A guided meditation.  :Thmbsup:


Slow Down Music - Where I commit thought crimes...

Freedom is the right to be wrong, not the right to do wrong. - John Diefenbaker

IainB

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #4842 on: November 18, 2015, 05:49 AM »
From Charles Dickens (Channeling Jorge Luis Borges) Created a Fake Library, with 37 Witty Invented Book Titles:
Quote
[Charles Dickens] decided to fill two spaces in his new study with bookcases containing fake books, the witty titles of which he had invented. And so, on October 22nd, he wrote to a bookbinder named Thomas Robert Eeles and supplied him with the following “list of imitation book-backs” to be produced.
  1.     History of a Short Chancery Suit
  2.     Catalogue of Statues of the Duke of Wellington
  3.     Five Minutes in China. 3 vols.
  4.     Forty Winks at the Pyramids. 2 vols.
  5.     Abernethy on the Constitution. 2 vols.
  6.     Mr. Green’s Overland Mail. 2 vols.
  7.     Captain Cook’s Life of Savage. 2 vols.
  8.     A Carpenter’s Bench of Bishops. 2 vols.
  9.     Toot’s Universal Letter-Writer. 2 vols.
  10.     Orson’s Art of Etiquette.
  11.     Downeaster’s Complete Calculator.
  12.     History of the Middling Ages. 6 vols.
  13.     Jonah’s Account of the Whale.
  14.     Captain Parry’s Virtues of Cold Tar.
  15.     Kant’s Ancient Humbugs. 10 vols.
  16.     Bowwowdom. A Poem.
  17.     The Quarrelly Review. 4 vols.
  18.     The Gunpowder Magazine. 4 vols.
  19.     Steele. By the Author of “Ion.”
  20.     The Art of Cutting the Teeth.
  21.     Matthew’s Nursery Songs. 2 vols.
  22.     Paxton’s Bloomers. 5 vols.
  23.     On the Use of Mercury by the Ancient Poets.
  24.     Drowsy’s Recollections of Nothing. 3 vols.
  25.     Heavyside’s Conversations with Nobody. 3 vols.
  26.     Commonplace Book of the Oldest Inhabitant. 2 vols.
  27.     Growler’s Gruffiology, with Appendix. 4 vols.
  28.     The Books of Moses and Sons. 2 vols.
  29.     Burke (of Edinburgh) on the Sublime and Beautiful. 2 vols.
  30.     Teazer’s Commentaries.
  31.     King Henry the Eighth’s Evidences of Christianity. 5 vols.
  32.     Miss Biffin on Deportment.
  33.     Morrison’s Pills Progress. 2 vols.
  34.     Lady Godiva on the Horse.
  35.     Munchausen’s Modern Miracles. 4 vols.
  36.     Richardson’s Show of Dramatic Literature. 12 vols.
  37.     Hansard’s Guide to Refreshing Sleep. As many volumes as possible.

Deozaan

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #4843 on: November 18, 2015, 05:57 AM »
I don't "get" any of those book titles. :huh:

IainB

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #4844 on: November 18, 2015, 06:33 AM »
NSFW - A guided meditation.  :Thmbsup:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=92i5m3tV5XY
________________________________

:Thmbsup:  I reckon this might be almost as good as TM (Transcendental Meditation).

IainB

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #4845 on: November 18, 2015, 06:43 AM »
I don't "get" any of those book titles. :huh:
______________________
You have my sympathies.

Stoic Joker

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #4846 on: November 18, 2015, 12:41 PM »
NSFW - A guided meditation.  :Thmbsup:

...video...

Wait, What! ...Somebody has stolen my meditation technique and documented it as their own?!? Son-Of-A-Bi... I am totally suing their balls off!!!

MilesAhead

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #4847 on: November 18, 2015, 01:00 PM »
NSFW - A guided meditation.  :Thmbsup:

...video...

Wait, What! ...Somebody has stolen my meditation technique and documented it as their own?!? Son-Of-A-Bi... I am totally suing their balls off!!!

I guess what they say is true.  Meditation dissipates worldly concerns and tensions.  Relaxes the psyche.  Elevates us to a plateau of serenity :)

MilesAhead

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #4848 on: November 18, 2015, 03:21 PM »
NSFW - A guided meditation.  :Thmbsup:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=92i5m3tV5XY
________________________________

:Thmbsup:  I reckon this might be almost as good as TM (Transcendental Meditation).

The vid was amusing.  I never dabbled in TM.  I did recently see a video where Alan Watts demonstrated his meditation technique.  He sat on a hard cushion with his legs folded staring in front of him and down.  Not thinking of anything.  No music.  Seemed like a good way of avoiding overthinking it since the object was not to thing for a bit.  Also it has the advantage of not paying a guru or taking a class in it.  Can't beat the price.  :)

IainB

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Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content]
« Reply #4849 on: November 18, 2015, 05:29 PM »
...I never dabbled in TM. ...
______________________________

A bit off-topic: TM is simple and easy to do. It takes a bit of practice, that's all.
Here is practical TM explained in 5 steps:

  1. To start: Sit down comfortably somewhere relatively quiet and peaceful, hands on knees, and relax. Pick a meaningless (to you) word-sound - e.g., (say) "reerong". Say it out loud and keep repeating it. This is your mantra. It must have no real meaning for you. Keep saying it and close your eyes, then listen to the sound of your voice saying the mantra over and over. Make the sound of your voice saying the mantra your sole focus of attention. Do this for about 5 minutes, listening to the sound of your voice saying it slower, then faster, then slower, maybe a higher tone, then a lower one, so you become familiar with how you sound whenever you speak the mantra.
  2. Internalise: Then, still listening with the mantra as your sole focus of attention, slowly reduce the volume of your voice until it fades away into silence, but continue to to hear it in your mind, repeating the mantra endlessly, slower, faster, higher lower, whatever you feel "sounds" right. You are the only one who can "hear" your voice repeating the mantra in your mind, and the sound of it is your sole focus of attention.
  3. Practice: For the first time, do this silent mantra for about 10 minutes, then stop and slowly make yourself aware of the world about you. After that, perform this silent mantra meditation each day, twice a day if you can, working up to about 15 minutes each time - no more is necessary. Never use the mantra aloud after that first time, unless it is to remind yourself of what it sounds like in your voice whilst you are still learning how to do it.
  4. Distractions: As you meditate, external sounds or thoughts like bubbles will percolate up from your mind, and these will momentarily distract your attention from the mantra. When that happens, just gently come back to mantra. Don't get frustrated or annoyed with the distractions and bubbles, they represent your mind's natural state whilst being awake, so just calmly focus on getting back to listening to the imagined sound of your voice repeating the mantra in your mind.
  5. Skill: Pretty soon, with practice, the majority of your 15-minute meditation time will be spent purely on focusing on listening to the imagined sound of your voice repeating the mantra. Each time, stop after the approx. 15 minutes and slowly make yourself aware of the world about you. Then make yourself alert with deep breaths. Be kind to yourself and avoid abruptly snatching yourself back into alertness. Don't worry if the meditation makes you fall asleep. It can be a super way of calming the mind and getting to sleep when you are tired but your mind is buzzing.

That's all there is to it really. No mumbo-jumbo. You might be surprised at how it improves your state of mind and health.

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