Life Imitates Art - DateCheck - run a background check on your date

[40hz]

Some of you might have seen a throwaway comedy from the 80s called Amazon Women on the Moon.

As a comedy, it wasn't all that great. But one of the vignettes, a segment usually referred to as the "Two Forms of ID" skit became quite famous. The sketch revolves around a guy showing up to pick of his blind date for the evening.

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[SKesselman]

       

Checking on someone's net worth? For a date??? How...inelegant.

But the criminal background check has been a long time coming. 

I guess it's good to know if your date's actually a convicted felon - not that it stopped me  but I'm a little older & wiser now.
The trouble is that here in California, it's tough to find a guy that hasn't been in trouble with the law at least once.
It's the type of crime that makes a difference.
Maybe I've been watching too much news lately, but if I were dating now, I'd be checking every one of my date's criminal backgrounds.
Unless he was really well known.
There's just too much weird stuff going on these days.

Cute video clip, though. 

[Gwen7]

The trouble is that here in California, it's tough to find a guy that hasn't been in trouble with the law at least once.
It's the type of crime that makes a difference.

Really? Maybe you'd better move East if that's true. Single men with criminal records are definitely not the rule where I live.

[cranioscopical]

not that it stopped me

So, your engagement ring had a jail-house rock?

[SKesselman]

not that it stopped me

So, your engagement ring had a jail-house rock?

Yes, but it was an Impossible Dream. His Suspicious Mind eventually caused us to go our Separate Ways.

[gpetrant]

Hey, if she looks like Scarlett Johansson, a criminal record is icing on the cake.  I like my women like I like my coding: seriously messed up, unreadable, and built for a good time, not a long time.   

[cranioscopical]

Impossible Dream. His Suspicious Mind eventually caused us to go our Separate Ways.

That Devil In Disguise always leaves someone Crying In The Chapel 

[SKesselman]

Impossible Dream. His Suspicious Mind eventually caused us to go our Separate Ways.

That Devil In Disguise always leaves someone Crying In The Chapel 

Well, I see now, I Got Lucky; I'm Not the Marrying Kind.
To him, I was a Hard-Headed Woman, Always Steppin' out of Line
   

[cranioscopical]

Impossible Dream. His Suspicious Mind eventually caused us to go our Separate Ways.

That Devil In Disguise always leaves someone Crying In The Chapel 

Well, I see now, I Got Lucky; I'm Not the Marrying Kind.
To him, I was a Hard-Headed Woman, Always Steppin' out of Line
      

Okay Sarah, I know when I'm outgunned! I must bow to your superior knowledge and leave the building. 

[SKesselman]

Okay Sarah, I know when I'm outgunned! I must bow to your superior knowledge and leave the building. 

Oh, please. Elvis only has hundreds of songs to work with; I'm just trying to keep you on your toes...
But OK, No More  .

[cranioscopical]

Uh huh huh!

[40hz]

@ SKesselman & Cranioscopical - I'd love to see you two get into it in real time on an IRC channel.
It would be better than Letterman and Leno combined. (A lot less crude too, probably.)

[MilesAhead]

not that it stopped me

So, your engagement ring had a jail-house rock?

I like a good play on words, but that one is Return To Sender dude!!

I always knew you ain't nuthin' but a Hound Dog.

Reading a post like that, well, That's When Your Heartaches Begin.

All I can say is, you can do anything just don' step on my Blue Suede Shoes.
 

[cranioscopical]

Hey Miles, I'm All Shook Up!

[MilesAhead]

Hey Miles, I'm All Shook Up!

You da' King Creole man!!

[cranioscopical]

Hey Miles, I'm All Shook Up!

You da' King Creole man!!

Hey, A Little Less Conversation Until It's Time For You To Go 

[MilesAhead]

Hey Miles, I'm All Shook Up!

You da' King Creole man!!

Hey, A Little Less Conversation Until It's Time For You To Go 

Don't be cruel. 

[cranioscopical]

Don't be cruel. 

There Goes My Everything 

[MilesAhead]

Don't be cruel. 

There Goes My Everything 

Tough to deal with Suspicious Minds. 

[SKesselman]

Tough to deal with Suspicious Minds. 

Hey...no cheating! (That one's already been used.) 
You still have hundreds of other choices, though, Miles.

[cranioscopical]

Hey...no cheating! (That one's already been used.)

Yeah! Too Much!

[MilesAhead]

I cheated anyway by lookin' at the Wiki list!!  I still don't believe Elvis sang "blowin' in the wind" .. maybe a misprint?

Anyway, speaking of rocks, one of my favorite memories of the Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson is the night he had Professor Irwin Corey on.  Then Zsa Zsa Gabor followed.  She got engaged yet again and was waving this huge diamond ring around showing it off.  She shows it to Corey. who admires it, then says "Hmmmmmmm, and how did you get this?  On the Lay Away Plan?"

People were rolling in the isles.  Zsa Zsa turned purple and was speechless(a feat in itself.)  When they came back from commercial Zsa Zsa was gone, never to return. I always liked the professor!

[cranioscopical]

Zsa Zsa turned purple and was speechless(a feat in itself.)

[MilesAhead]

Zsa Zsa turned purple and was speechless(a feat in itself.)

I just wish I had that recorded. I did get to share the chuckle with The Professor(tm) though.  He was on a radio talk show.  I called in and told the story while he was on.  Everyone enjoyed it tremendously.