Why do so many fruits and vegetables look like human genitalia?

[gpetrant]

I would deeply appreciate having my question taken seriously and treated with sensitivity.  I...umm...I find certain fruits and vegetables very erotic.  So much so, that I've been banned from 3 major supermarkets in my home community last year.  One of them said that I, and I quote, 'fondled their melons in a lewd and lascivious manner unbefitting the dignity under which they've always conducted commerce in this family oriented community.'  Now where do these guys get off humiliating a fellow human being with a genuine medical condition called CUP (chronic untreated priapism), who likes to check his melons before making a purchasing decision?  Please discuss.  I mean, is that fascist or what?  Can any of you guys relate?  Have you never wondered why God (or mother nature) put a cleft in fuzzy peaches, but not in apples, oranges, or grapes? 

[Ehtyar]

In the time it would have taken you to be banned from 3 supermarket chains, untreated priapism would most likely have killed you, not to mention that it is not associated with any known neurological conditions. Please elaborate on your condition or remove your post.

Ehtyar.

[Deozaan]

April Fool's was back in April. You're either very late or very early.

Don't quit your day job and go into stand up comedy because none of this is funny.

EDIT: And for the record: I'll take your questions seriously and treat them with sensitivity when you stop treating me like an idiot.

[Darwin]

Have you never wondered why God (or mother nature) put a cleft in fuzzy peaches, but not in apples, oranges, or grapes?

Nope.

[SirSmiley]

I'm gonna go out on the edge here and guess you're from the West Coast?
In particular Pot City. :/

Edit: If you also giggle when you click the "go down" link at the top of the thread then seek immediate professional help.

[40hz]

Suggestion: Lurk before you leap.

[Darwin]

I'm gonna go out on the edge here and guess you're from the West Coast?
In particular Pot City. :/

Edit: If you also giggle when you click the "go down" link at the top of the thread then seek immediate professional help.

getrant is from North Bay, Ontario (ie far from the West Coast)... I just read his bio for the first time - he's pretty open about this stuff there.