Main Area and Open Discussion > Living Room
Sci-fi novel now available from DC member kyrathaba!
kyrathaba:
"What I do propose..." sounds so wrong to me.
--- End quote ---
What chapter is that in, please? My editor doesn't show paragraph numbering, and I can't seem to locate it with a search.
"...and that's descending via the Shaft."
--- End quote ---
Corrected to above phrasing.
For all we know, he may have been a mole assigned a decade-long post here, or that the entire race is in regular telepathic communication.
--- End quote ---
Fixed.
thanks :)
4wd:
"What I do propose..." sounds so wrong to me.
--- End quote ---
What chapter is that in, please? My editor doesn't show paragraph numbering, and I can't seem to locate it with a search.-kyrathaba (July 01, 2013, 11:33 AM)
--- End quote ---
Chapter 7:
What I propose is that we modify certain checkpoints, ....
I was just responding to what I thought was Perry's suggestion to put do in but there is also a missing quote at the start of the line.
4wd:
Chapter 7
Paragraph 16.16
"They’ll either do nothing, or else perhaps send an extraction team. Either way, the suggestions that have been made today, and the executive orders you intend to sign[,] will put us well on our way to addressing the possible threats." I don't think that Jamie would have been so exact with only two options after 'too many unknowns'... leaves me thinking what about this, or that, or something else?? I'd add that comma too.-Perry Mowbray (July 01, 2013, 09:51 AM)
--- End quote ---
This is true, I've got four options that immediately spring to mind:
1. do nothing
2. send another infiltrator for intelligence gathering,
(aliens are unaware of any anti-infiltration measures taken at this point in time)
3. ground assault for material/intelligence gathering and extraction
4. plain old fashioned nuke the bunker
kyrathaba:
Change made in Ch. 7:
"So, what if they do notice something’s amiss here? They have multiple responses available: do nothing, send an extraction team, nuke us to oblivion, launch a ground assault. What matters is that the suggestions that have been made today, and the executive orders you intend to sign, will put us well on our way to addressing the possible threats.”
--- End quote ---
Perry Mowbray:
"What I do propose..." sounds so wrong to me.
--- End quote ---
What chapter is that in, please? My editor doesn't show paragraph numbering, and I can't seem to locate it with a search.-kyrathaba (July 01, 2013, 11:33 AM)
--- End quote ---
Chapter 7:
What I propose is that we modify certain checkpoints, ....
I was just responding to what I thought was Perry's suggestion to put do in but there is also a missing quote at the start of the line.
-4wd (July 01, 2013, 11:40 AM)
--- End quote ---
:-[ I just thought that 'do' would be in reference with the previous proposal, which he wasn't really proposing. In my head it I guess I had emphasis on the do, but I didn't mark it up that way. I think that's the way I would have said it (but I often sound so wrong ;) )
Navigation
[0] Message Index
[#] Next page
[*] Previous page
Go to full version