Main Area and Open Discussion > Living Room
Sci-fi novel now available from DC member kyrathaba!
kyrathaba:
Found conflicting descriptors:
Less than a meter from his right hand sat an albino crayfish, a big one. And in one claw it held what remained of its meal of cave cricket. He zoomed in with the videocorder.
“Holy crap!” Jaimie breathed over the radio waves.
“My thought, exactly,” Grant said calmly. “He sure is a whopper, isn’t he? Look at the spread of its uropod, Jaimie. He’s well-fed.” His camera paused video recording to take several closeup snapshots of the creature. It was red and had a bumpy exoskeleton.
4wd:
Chapter 13:
There was a wooden table. Some sort of playback device sat on it, rather loudly emanating these voices to which he’d been raptly listening.
--- End quote ---
Possibly:
There was a wooden table upon which sat some sort of playback device. The voices, to which he'd been raptly listening, emanated loudly from it.
All of the equipment in the chamber dissolved in the blast, as did Dukensenmatchlofel in the middle of his mental scream.
--- End quote ---
I think vaporized is more correct of a nuclear explosion, dissolved usually means "to a liquid state". I guess it depends how you want to interpret dissolve though, (eg. vanish):
All of the equipment in the chamber was vaporized in the blast, as was Dukensenmatchlofel in the middle of his mental scream.
Chapter 14:
That was flat zippy for a diver in full gear.
--- End quote ---
This might just be a difference in American/English colloquialism but we'd say:
That was flat out zippy for a diver in full gear.
kyrathaba:
Changed cover image. See OP. The small image links to a larger one. Decided not to go with a pseudonym.
Ath:
Decided not to go with a pseudonym.
-kyrathaba (June 22, 2013, 09:20 AM)
--- End quote ---
The on-line version currently still has the pseudonym, I guess ;)
kyrathaba:
^ Yes, Ath, the pseudonym will disappear when I upload all versions (epub, mobi, html) of the book once completing Ch. 15.
Navigation
[0] Message Index
[#] Next page
[*] Previous page
Go to full version