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Sci-fi novel now available from DC member kyrathaba!

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1. How many forum members/visitors are reading this work? I know about 40hz, 4wd, and Perry Mowbray. Anyone else?
-kyrathaba (June 17, 2013, 08:04 PM)
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I'm "lurking nearby"! : )

Perry Mowbray:
So where is the app that is going to come out of this regarding the facilitation of exchange and management of change suggestions in written works?
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Microsoft Word in mark-up mode?

Although I know what you mean, ewemoa. Why don't you code it for NANY 2014?
-kyrathaba (June 17, 2013, 07:20 PM)
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I've used Google docs successfully for small numbers of people, tho' the rules are not there like in MSWord.

Wouldn't a change timeline feature be cool (so you could see the evolution by changing a slider)... or even author selector...

Chapter 9:
One of the first things she would want to do would be to get with the top roboticists in Engineering and get a pair of robot probes prepared to travel downriver underwater, ....
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Since we're already narrating w.r.t Jaimie's POV, (even though in third person), I feel the 'she' is redundant.  Substituting 'organize' makes 'prepared' redundant, perhaps:

One of the first things would be to meet with the top roboticists in Engineering and organize a pair of robot to travel downriver underwater, ....

You managed to sneak a couple more in while I wasn't looking  ;D

It was a sphere approximately two miles in diameter, a small moon of a metallic composite.
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Right now, she carried the seven-foot length of wood like a walking staff, pointy end up.
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Although, I'm in two minds about the last since within 'Kyrathaba', if it was to be marketed as an escapist game, they would undoubtedly have used a completely different scale of measurements so as to truly distance it from reality.  Of course, that opens up even more cans of worms trying to remember to switch back and forth depending where the story is located at that time, but it's been done before in novels.

For the convenience of proof-readers who may not want to have to keep downloading epub or mobi files, I've added a link to the entire book online, in html format.-kyrathaba (June 17, 2013, 07:51 PM)
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That certainly makes my posts easier but I find it good to be able to read the epub on my phone where I can bookmark passages, (FBReader), and then when I'm sitting in front of the computer, refer back to them.

SpoilerAlthough I know what you mean, ewemoa. Why don't you code it for NANY 2014?
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I think it would read better like so:

I know what you mean though, ewemoa, why don't you code it for NANY 2014?

Yes, I'm being silly....

Perry Mowbray:
I'm not on a epub reader (using the html at work) so no page.paragraphs...

Chapter 10:
"But the more people I bring into my circle of confidence, the more potential humans an invasion force could torture for information extraction." 'potential humans'?

"The group sat in a tavern within the town that styled itself “The Prancing Unicorn”" styled??

Thanks 4wd and Perry. Your noted areas of concern have been addressed and will be reflected in future uploads. The locals in the Land of Kyrathaba environment/reality use a length of measurement they call a lambit, which is equal to 46 cm. When trying to explain smaller distances, somehow compare it to a fraction of a lambit, by estimating how many of those lengths would have to be connected to equal a lambit. Convoluted and archaic, right? When discussing walking/traveling distances, they discuss the Greater Lambit, which is equal to 1,000 lambits.
Within the context of the Earth environment in the book (non-Kyrathaba reality), I'll stick with metric.


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