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Author Topic: Guide to Living with Introverts  (Read 14264 times)

mouser

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Guide to Living with Introverts
« on: August 20, 2016, 12:24 PM »
Nice little cartoon guide to living with Introverts.
It uses an analogy I've seen before, describing extroverts as being recharged by social interaction vs introverts as having to spend energy to engage in social interactions -- which rings true to me (though I don't think it's the whole story).

http://romanjones.de...-Printable-320818879

Screenshot - 8_20_2016 , 12_27_08 PM.png

From http://www.neatorama.com/

mouser

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Re: Guide to Living with Introverts
« Reply #1 on: August 20, 2016, 12:28 PM »
Let me add a piece that I think is missing from this picture of introversion.  Speaking for myself I have found that "unstructured" socialization can be extremely painful -- things like just sitting around at a dinner party talking to one another about random things.  Whereas structured social activities (board games) are quite fun.  I don't know if that's true for all introverts, so your mileage may vary.

tomos

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Re: Guide to Living with Introverts
« Reply #2 on: August 20, 2016, 02:09 PM »
here's a bigger (printable) version:
http://romanjones.de...-available-291305760

The energy idea is very interesting. I do get that that some people (try to) steal energy. The 'amn't I great' is one way, the 'poor me' another.

I do remember the introversion topic coming up on dc a good while back and someone seperating the idea of shyness from the idea of introvertedness. I can relate to that because although I'm more of an extrovert, I am also (very often, at any rate) very shy.

Maybe one is nature (introvert/extrovert), the other conditioning of some sort? Not being very articulate here, but thinking that shyness is maybe to do with ways of thinking, probably usually related to what we learned growing up (especially through example). Whereas I presume one can be introverted and just not want to talk to people in many situations, without having to be shy. As someone who at times waffles when nervous/meeting new people, I would have great respect for that (i.e. for being relaxed yet not wanting to say much at that moment and time).

Especially loved part two of the comic: 'How to interact...' :up:
Tom

Stoic Joker

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Re: Guide to Living with Introverts
« Reply #3 on: August 22, 2016, 07:00 AM »
Let me add a piece that I think is missing from this picture of introversion.  Speaking for myself I have found that "unstructured" socialization can be extremely painful -- things like just sitting around at a dinner party talking to one another about random things.  Whereas structured social activities (board games) are quite fun.  I don't know if that's true for all introverts, so your mileage may vary.

That works for me. If there is a purpose to an interaction, I'm fine ... But trying to  engage in casual conversation (e.g. "Small Talk") I completely short circuit.

TucknDar

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Re: Guide to Living with Introverts
« Reply #4 on: August 22, 2016, 08:21 AM »
So... how about the weather, huh? <-- Me making small talk :-[

Nice guide, btw!  :Thmbsup:

wraith808

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Re: Guide to Living with Introverts
« Reply #5 on: August 22, 2016, 09:20 AM »
Let me add a piece that I think is missing from this picture of introversion.  Speaking for myself I have found that "unstructured" socialization can be extremely painful -- things like just sitting around at a dinner party talking to one another about random things.  Whereas structured social activities (board games) are quite fun.  I don't know if that's true for all introverts, so your mileage may vary.

That works for me. If there is a purpose to an interaction, I'm fine ... But trying to  engage in casual conversation (e.g. "Small Talk") I completely short circuit.

Same here.  I didn't even realize what the problem was until my wife pointed it out.  I can't make small talk.  I've tried, but as Stoic said, I completely short circuit.

Stoic Joker

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Re: Guide to Living with Introverts
« Reply #6 on: August 22, 2016, 11:28 AM »
Let me add a piece that I think is missing from this picture of introversion.  Speaking for myself I have found that "unstructured" socialization can be extremely painful -- things like just sitting around at a dinner party talking to one another about random things.  Whereas structured social activities (board games) are quite fun.  I don't know if that's true for all introverts, so your mileage may vary.

That works for me. If there is a purpose to an interaction, I'm fine ... But trying to  engage in casual conversation (e.g. "Small Talk") I completely short circuit.

Same here.  I didn't even realize what the problem was until my wife pointed it out.  I can't make small talk.  I've tried, but as Stoic said, I completely short circuit.

IRL I'm a quiet, stoic, man-of-few-words...and the one question that is most likely to piss me off almost instantly is 'Why don't you smile'. I'm quite happy in my "Little Ball" and if one tries to pry me out of it (e.g. a high energy pest) Shit. Will. Hit. The. Fan... ;) :D

nite_monkey

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Re: Guide to Living with Introverts
« Reply #7 on: August 23, 2016, 03:27 AM »
I have to agree with the comic, and what mouser added. I am an introvert, and it annoys me to no end when anyone says "you don't talk much." I don't like small talk, however, if we sit down and play a fun board game, I will be more inclined to strike up a conversation with you. I have also found that if I've gotten to know you better, I'll talk to you more. I talk to my best friend all the time, and we have a blast talking about random nonsense. I also have one co-worker who I enjoy joking around with, and time flies by at work with her.
[Insert really cool signature here]

anandcoral

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Re: Guide to Living with Introverts
« Reply #8 on: August 23, 2016, 03:41 AM »
Thank GOD I am not alone.

I am totally cut off, as said by my friends and relatives. I think it was due to my programming nature, trying to make a code of every problem I face, but can not answer what is happening in the world. Now I can relax, I have "friends" here :)

panzer

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Re: Guide to Living with Introverts
« Reply #9 on: August 23, 2016, 05:14 AM »

and the one question that is most likely to piss me off almost instantly is 'Why don't you smile'.

or "Why are you so sad?"

I am an introvert, and it annoys me to no end when anyone says "you don't talk much."

Indeed.

Arizona Hot

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Re: Guide to Living with Introverts
« Reply #10 on: September 27, 2016, 02:50 PM »
I may not be an introvert. If someone said "You don't talk much" to me, I would reply "About what?".

Deozaan

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Re: Guide to Living with Introverts
« Reply #11 on: September 27, 2016, 11:30 PM »
I am an introvert, and it annoys me to no end when anyone says "you don't talk much."

If someone says that, or they tell me that I'm quiet, I see it as an attempt to get me to speak up, so I just smile and nod.

fredemeister

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Re: Guide to Living with Introverts
« Reply #12 on: December 08, 2016, 03:43 PM »
I agree with this cartoon, and here's a way to see if someone is worth cultivating...

Me: Ask me if I'm a policeman
Friend Who Should Know Better:  Are you a policeman?
Me: No.
Friend Who Should Know Better:  Uh?
Me: [Hysterical laughter]

I've met about seven people in three years who understand that, so my circle of acquaintances is not large.

tomos

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Re: Guide to Living with Introverts
« Reply #13 on: December 08, 2016, 03:52 PM »
I agree with this cartoon, and here's a way to see if someone is worth cultivating...

Me: Ask me if I'm a policeman
Friend Who Should Know Better:  Are you a policeman?
Me: No.
Friend Who Should Know Better:  Uh?
Me: [Hysterical laughter]

I've met about seven people in three years who understand that, so my circle of acquaintances is not large.

I'm possibly not worth aquainting then ;-)
although I'd ask 'Why?' rather than 'are you...'
Tom

fredemeister

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Re: Guide to Living with Introverts
« Reply #14 on: December 08, 2016, 06:15 PM »
I agree with this cartoon, and here's a way to see if someone is worth cultivating...

Me: Ask me if I'm a policeman
Friend Who Should Know Better:  Are you a policeman?
Me: No.
Friend Who Should Know Better:  Uh?
Me: [Hysterical laughter]

I've met about seven people in three years who understand that, so my circle of acquaintances is not large.

I'm possibly not worth aquainting then ;-)

One can't make judgements in a forum. :).


although I'd ask 'Why?' rather than 'are you...'

You would receive the statement, "never mind, just ask".

Please don't follow this to its conclusion.

tomos

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Re: Guide to Living with Introverts
« Reply #15 on: December 08, 2016, 06:31 PM »
Please don't follow this to its conclusion.

no worries
Tom

Deozaan

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Re: Guide to Living with Introverts
« Reply #16 on: December 13, 2016, 01:40 AM »
Introverts Unite.jpg