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Author Topic: Read this article before Apple makes them take it down! (hee-hee)  (Read 3362 times)

40hz

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You'd think by now that Gizmodo had had its fill of messing with Apple and it's legal department wouldn't you?

Well...apparently not. They recently got access to Apple's internal training manual for "Geniuses" and decided to share their impressions of what it's all about. Full article here.

smalldobs.jpg

Quote
How To Be a Genius: This Is Apple’s Secret Employee Training Manual
Sam Biddle


We recently showed you just how badly some of Apple's retail elite behave when no one's watching, but surely they were taught better, right? You bet they were: Apple tells its new recruits exactly what what to think and say. How do we know? We read Apple's secret Genius Training Manual from cover to cover.

It's a penetrating look inside Apple: psychological mastery, banned words, roleplaying—you've never seen anything like it.

The Genius Training Student Workbook we received is the company's most up to date, we're told, and runs a bizarre gamut of Apple Dos and Don'ts, down to specific words you're not allowed to use, and lessons on how to identify and capitalize on human emotions. The manual could easily serve as the Humanity 101 textbook for a robot university, but at Apple, it's an exhaustive manual to understanding customers and making them happy. Sales, it turns out, take a backseat to good vibes—almost the entire volume is dedicated to empathizing, consoling, cheering up, and correcting various Genius Bar confrontations. The assumption, it'd seem, is that a happy customer is a customer who will buy things. And no matter how much the Apple Store comes off as some kind of smiling likeminded computer commune, it's still a store above all—just one that puts an enormous amount of effort behind getting inside your head.

Not surprisingly it reads like a mixture of Hubbard, Napoleon Hill, and Tony Robbins spiced with some standard "consultative selling" seminar work. Small surprise in that Apple is based in CA, that lovely State that brought so many great ideas and unique outlooks to the American experience. :D

Fun read. It explains a lot. I mean we all suspected that's how they train them. But at least now we know we're not just imagining things. ;D
« Last Edit: August 29, 2012, 02:08:43 PM by 40hz, Reason: Added link to article »

f0dder

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Re: Read this article before Apple makes them take it down! (hee-hee)
« Reply #1 on: August 29, 2012, 03:25:13 PM »
Small surprise in that Apple is based in CA, that lovely State that brought so many great ideas and unique outlooks to the American experience. :D
There's a Marilyn Manson song that explains that ^_^
- carpe noctem

SeraphimLabs

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Re: Read this article before Apple makes them take it down! (hee-hee)
« Reply #2 on: August 29, 2012, 03:47:14 PM »
....

I am now deeply terrified of my chosen career path, and how I am able to do the bulk of the things I do on the job. People know they can count on me for answers, or for at least some insight into why something happened.

Some of the methods I use on the job- without any training to use them that way, are outlined in Apple's book.

Maybe I should send them my resume. If it wasn't for my inherent dislike of the attitude of Apple product users, I'd almost certainly fit in within a week.


Edvard

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Re: Read this article before Apple makes them take it down! (hee-hee)
« Reply #3 on: August 29, 2012, 03:54:48 PM »
Quote
...almost the entire volume is dedicated to empathizing, consoling, cheering up, and correcting various Genius Bar confrontations. The assumption, it'd seem, is that a happy customer is a customer who will buy things.
Well, that explains how people are cajoled into buying ridiculously overpriced stuff, but it's also a spot-on amalgam of sales and customer service.  I know a few companies who could stand to take some cues from Apple.  Even if I'm penniless, at least make me feel good about it... that's why I spent money in the first place!  ;D


p.s. Still not gonna buy any Apple products in the near future, even if I had the cash.  Just sayin'

40hz

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Re: Read this article before Apple makes them take it down! (hee-hee)
« Reply #4 on: August 29, 2012, 04:02:26 PM »
Small surprise in that Apple is based in CA, that lovely State that brought so many great ideas and unique outlooks to the American experience. :D
There's a Marilyn Manson song that explains that ^_^



 :Thmbsup:

mwb1100

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Re: Read this article before Apple makes them take it down! (hee-hee)
« Reply #5 on: August 29, 2012, 04:03:54 PM »
Doesn't look like any kind of surprise to me - selling is a large part psychology, and I think that any salesman would agree with that.  Why wouldn't Apple train their sales people to use phrases that make customers feel good or to deflect from problems they might have experienced with Apple products or pricing?  I would think that would be standard operating procedure in any sales organization, from your boiler room scam artists or your friendly neighborhood used car dealership to your billion dollar military contract provider.

rxantos

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Re: Read this article before Apple makes them take it down! (hee-hee)
« Reply #6 on: August 30, 2012, 09:29:30 PM »
So basically an Apple Genius is a trained hypocrite.

Good to know.

barney

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Re: Read this article before Apple makes them take it down! (hee-hee)
« Reply #7 on: August 30, 2012, 09:49:20 PM »
So basically an Apple Genius is a trained hypocrite.

Good to know.

Doesn't matter ... unless you wanna buy an Apple product.  Then it still won't matter, 'cause you wanna buy an Apple product  :P.