Lost my father ~three (3) years ago, my mother ~two (2). Can't say whether what you feel is what I felt (I suspect it is), but time does dull the edges, although not the memories. Save those, above all. ('Tis said time heals all wounds, but that's a lie: it just lets 'em scab over.) Great sorrow for your pain and grieving.
I also lost my father back in 2008...Please don't be as stupid as I was and take to the Alcohol...Its a VERY bad idea and didn't help a single iota