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Last post Author Topic: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)  (Read 16495 times)

Renegade

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Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« on: April 18, 2011, 11:03 AM »
Prepare to piss yourself laughing...



And from JoS:

...I added text with coupon code (40% off) to the EULA... It was at about half scroll down and masked inside the text, so only people who actually read it will get the discount...

Results, as many of you may already propose: no one bought using this coupon!

(Go look at the screenshot again... you probably didn't read it... :p )

Hahahahaha~!

That's just way funny!
Slow Down Music - Where I commit thought crimes...

Freedom is the right to be wrong, not the right to do wrong. - John Diefenbaker

nosh

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #1 on: April 18, 2011, 12:56 PM »
 :D

I pity the fool who reads every EULA!

Armando

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #2 on: April 18, 2011, 01:33 PM »
 ;D

housetier

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #3 on: April 18, 2011, 01:49 PM »
I don't think I have ever read any EULA. When I did scroll down to the very end it was because otherwise the continue button wouldn't activate.

wraith808

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #4 on: April 18, 2011, 01:56 PM »
I don't think I have ever read any EULA. When I did scroll down to the very end it was because otherwise the continue button wouldn't activate.

^ This +1

rgdot

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #5 on: April 18, 2011, 03:42 PM »
EULA should read:

You bought it now use it but don't ask for support

 :P

mwb1100

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #6 on: April 18, 2011, 03:51 PM »
I'll often scan a EULA to get details on the vendor's policy for allowing multiple computer/single user use (or not allowing it), when I can't get that cleared up on the the vendor's website.  I still might not have gotten to the discount, since the answer to my question is in item (c).

Now I have to find out what RadioBOSS is...  Doesn't sound like something that even a 40% discount would make me bite.

By the way, a sometimes I've done something similar with documents I write for work.  When sending them out for review, I put in a line of text saying, "If you're the first reviewer to mention this sentence, I'll buy you lunch."  I'd say about half the time, I get called on it.  I can't remember where i got the idea - I think it was at my first 'real' job at a transit/traffic consulting firm where someone did this.
« Last Edit: April 18, 2011, 04:01 PM by mwb1100 »

MilesAhead

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #7 on: April 18, 2011, 05:03 PM »
Hmmmm, I wonder if there are any laws about minimum font size with these agreements.  Some of the print is so small it might as well be on a microdot.

Even if you can read it, unless you've been to law school, what good is it? Usually the terms are not what a reasonable person would infer but some jazz about "customary practice."  Meaning, business has been ripping people off this way for over 100 years, therefore it's "customary practice" in the industry.  So quit bitchin' about it and take the hit!!   :D

If they really wanted people to read it they should give away one of those divers where you put baking soda in his boot to make him go. :)



Deozaan

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #8 on: April 18, 2011, 05:33 PM »
What about people who already bought it before installing it, therefore not having even been presented with the EULA until after purchase? How does the 40% discount work for them?

40hz

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #9 on: April 18, 2011, 06:46 PM »
By the way, a sometimes I've done something similar with documents I write for work.  When sending them out for review, I put in a line of text saying, "If you're the first reviewer to mention this sentence, I'll buy you lunch."  I'd say about half the time, I get called on it.  I can't remember where i got the idea - I think it was at my first 'real' job at a transit/traffic consulting firm where someone did this.

Hope you made out better than I did doing almost the same thing at my first real job.

I put a single line in the middle of a paragraph about halfway into a twenty page financial analysis I had just completed. I had offered to buy and bring the first person who saw it their morning coffee for an entire month.

I got called into my manager's office about an hour after I sent it up for approval. After being reminded we were expected to "act professionally at all times" (since this was the "grownup world") he strongly cautioned me against pulling any further "college pranks" if I planned on continuing to work there. I was then sent back to my desk with a red face and my tail between my legs.

But not before my manager also reminded me that, per my offer, I now owed him a month's worth of free coffee. (Black, two sugars please?)

(He made sure he collected on it too.)

 :-[
« Last Edit: April 18, 2011, 06:51 PM by 40hz »

mouser

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #10 on: April 18, 2011, 06:53 PM »
 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
nice story 40hz!

Eóin

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #11 on: April 18, 2011, 07:47 PM »
Not entirely related to Eula's, but I've always love this line from many OS licenses

This software is provided by the copyright holders and contributors "as is" and any express or implied warranties, including, but not limited to, the implied warranties of merchantability and fitness for a particular purpose are disclaimed

When included in a Eula, the user is actually accepting that the program might not be fit for use nor do what it claims to do. From a legal point it makes sense, but imagine if the websites were up front- "This program does X, but I don't claim it's suitable to do X!"

Renegade

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #12 on: April 18, 2011, 08:29 PM »
Many many moons ago, I had a very NSFW EULA... One person posted it somewhere on the net. He was bored, and looking for funny/odd EULAs for some reason. I forget where he posted it. Some blog.

So, at least one person read at least 1 EULA. :)

Anyways, for your amusement...

NSFW EULA
END USER LICENSE AGREEMENT

This is not your usual bullshit agreement. You need to read this.

By installing or using the Renegade Minds (the “Company”) product [Renegade Minds] Guitar and Drum Trainer (the “Software”) you indicate your agreement to the terms of this End User License Agreement (the “Agreement”).  If you do not agree to the terms herein, you are not authorized to copy or use the Software.  The Software, all images, photographs, icons, pornography and text incorporated in the Software, is owned by Company or its suppliers and is protected by United States copyright laws and international treaty provisions.  Except to the extent expressly licensed herein, all rights are reserved to Company and its suppliers.  You may not reverse engineer, decompile or disassemble the Software.

ATTENTION:  USE OF THE SOFTWARE IS SUBJECT TO THE TERMS SET FORTH BELOW.  USING THE SOFTWARE INDICATES YOUR ACCEPTANCE OF THESE TERMS.  IF YOU DO NOT ACCEPT THESE TERMS YOU ARE NOT AUTHORIZED TO USE THIS SOFTWARE, SO BUGGER OFF.


1.   LICENSE GRANT
The Company grants you a non-exclusive, royalty-free, worldwide right and license to use the executable version of the Software, where “use” in this Agreement means storing, loading, installing or executing the Software.  You may not modify the Software or disable any licensing or control features of the Software. You agree that you may not copy the written materials accompanying the Software.  You may copy the software for archival purposes so long as the copy is unmodified from the original distribution and the copy retains all of the original Software’s proprietary notices. You may not rent or lease your rights to the Software or documentation. If you are an individual and this Agreement is for a single license, you may install the Software on multiple computers provided that not more than one of those computers is in use simultaneously and that those computers are solely for your own use. If the Software license you have is for a single user license then the Software may be installed on a computer that is for multiple users but it may not be installed on more than one computer regardless of whether those computers are operated simultaneously or not. If this Agreement is for a multi-user (site) license or use during orgies, the number of orgy participants or computers on which the Software is installed may not exceed the number of licenses purchased, regardless of whether the computer is used by multiple users or not. You may use this software in a networked environment on computers other than the computer on which the software is installed provided that you have purchased licenses for each computer or sex-addict that will use the software, regardless of whether those computers will use the software at the same time or not. 
If you are sufficiently cool, you may install the software on any number of computers and in any storage medium provided that you do not chronically masturbate. Get someone to do the masturbating for you. 
2.   OWNERSHIP
All right, title and interest in and to the Software is owned and copyrighted by the Company or its third party suppliers. Your license confers neither title to nor ownership in the Software and is not a sale of any rights in the Company. Company third party suppliers may protect their rights in the event of any violation of this License Agreement as if such suppliers were parties to this License Agreement.  No license is given to you under any patent or patent application of Company.

3.   COPIES AND ADAPTATIONS
Other than as provided in the License Grant section of this agreement, you may only make copies or adaptations of the Software for archival purposes or when copying or adaptation is an essential step in the authorized use of the Software. You must reproduce all copyright notices in the original Software on all copies or adaptations.

4.   NO DISASSEMBLY, RECOMPILATION OR DECRYPTION
You may not disassemble or decompile the Software unless Company prior written consent is obtained. In some jurisdictions, Company consent may not be required for limited disassembly or decompilation.  Upon request, you will provide Company with reasonably detailed information regarding any disassembly or decompilation. You may not decrypt the Software unless decryption is an essential step in the authorized use of the Software.

5.   NO WARRANTIES
TO THE MAXIMUM EXTENT PERMITTED BY APPLICABLE LAW, COMPANY EXPRESSLY DISCLAIMS ANY WARRANTY FOR THE SOFTWARE.  THE SOFTWARE AND ANY RELATED DOCUMENTATION IS PROVIDED “AS IS” WITHOUT WARRANTY OF ANY KIND, EITHER EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING WITHOUT LIMITATION, THE IMPLIED WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY, FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE AND NONINFRINGEMENT OF THIRD PARTY PROPRIETARY RIGHTS.  THE ENTIRE RISK ARISING OUT OF USE OR PERFORMANCE OF THE SOFTWARE REMAINS WITH YOU.
6.   NO LIABILITY FOR DAMAGES
TO THE MAXIMUM EXTENT PERMITTED BY APPLICABLE LAW, NEITHER COMPANY NOR ITS SUPPLIERS SHALL BE LIABLE FOR ANY INCIDENTAL, SPECIAL OR CONSEQUENTIAL DAMAGES WHATSOEVER (INCLUDING WITHOUT LIMITATION, DAMAGES FOR LOSS OF BUSINESS PROFIT, BUSINESS INTERRUPTION, LOSS OF BUSINESS INFORMATION, OR ANY OTHER PECUNIARY LOSS) ARISING OUT OF OR RELATING TO THE USE OR INABILITY TO USE THIS SOFTWARE, EVEN IF COMPANY HAS BEEN ADVISED OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH DAMAGES.  BECAUSE SOME JURISDICTIONS DO NOT ALLOW THE EXCLUSION OR LIMITATION OF LIABILITY FOR CONSEQUENTIAL OR INCIDENTAL DAMAGES, THE ABOVE LIMITATION MAY NOT APPLY TO YOU. FURTHERMORE, THE COMPANY’S LIABILITY FOR DIRECT DAMAGES SHALL NOT EXCEED THE LICENSE FEE, IF ANY, PAID BY YOU DIRECTLY TO THE COMPANY FOR USE OF THE PRODUCT OR ANY LICENSE FEE RECEIVED BY THE COMPANY FOR THE USE OF THE PRODUCT IF PURCHASED THROUGH AN AUTHORIZED THIRD PARTY.

7.   CUSTOMER REMEDIES
YOUR EXCLUSIVE REMEDY SHALL BE, AT COMPANY OPTION, REPAIR OR REPLACEMENT OF THE SOFTWARE OR REFUND OF PART OR ALL OF THE LICENSE FEE, IF ANY, PAID BY YOU FOR THE SOFTWARE.
If you did not pay Company for this software, then you are totally, 100% shit out of luck. So, considering the Software is free... you're fucked! AND any payment must have been in first borns, plural - i.e. you must have paid with several of your first borns. One is not enough.

8.   INDEMNIFICATION
This Software is intended for use with media, files, orgies, and content for which you have sufficient rights to, authority for, or ownership of. It is your responsibility to ascertain whether copyrights, patents, or other licenses are needed for the content that you use in conjunction with this Software. You agree to hold harmless, indemnify and defend the Company, its officers, directors, prostitues, employees and third party suppliers against any loss, damage, STD, fine, or expense (including blood money... err... I mean attorney’s fees) arising out of or related to any claim that you have used this Software in violation of applicable laws in your jurisdiction. It is your responsibility to abide by the laws of whichever jurisdiction you reside in.

9.   TERMINATION
This Agreement shall continue for the duration of Company copyright in the Software, unless earlier terminated as provided herein. The Company may terminate your license immediately without notice to you for your failure to comply with any of the terms set forth in this Agreement. Upon termination, you must immediately destroy the Software, together with all copies, adaptations and merged portions thereof in any form, or soak the medium in body fluids until no sane person would ever touch it. Obligations to pay accrued charges or fees shall survive the termination of this Agreement.
This Agreement shall be considered terminated the moment you start to chronically masturbate, because that just isn't very cool. That is unless you are trying to soak the medium in body fluids to destroy it, which is then ok.

10.   ASSIGNMENT AND NON-ASSIGNMENT
If you are an individual and this Agreement is for a single license, then this license is personal to you but you may assign your rights under this Agreement to the Devil or a third party who agrees in writing to be bound to this Agreement prior to the assignment and provided that you transfer all copies of the Software, registration keys and/or codes, and related documentation to the third party and destroy any copies not transferred. If you are an individual and this Agreement is for a multi-user license, or you are not an individual and are an entity, then you may not assign your rights under this Agreement without the prior written permission of the Company. If you are an entity that merges with or is acquired by another entity then your rights under this Agreement shall be deemed to be temporarily assigned to the resulting entity of that merge or acquisition provided that you supply the Company with written notice not later than the date on which any public announcement of that merger or acquisition is made.  Upon receipt of written notice, the Company shall have thirty (30) days to either accept or reject the assignment of rights. If you have sold your soul to the Devil, and the software is transferred to the Prince of Darkness along with your soul, then Company reserves the right to alter this agreement as it pleases in order to Fuck Satan. You are thus encouraged to sell your soul to the Devil and assign your rights to this software to the Devil as he drags you down into Hell.

11.   EXPORT REQUIREMENTS
You may not export or re-export the Software or any copy or adaptation in violation of any applicable laws or regulations.

12.   U.S. GOVERNMENT RESTRICTED RIGHTS
The Software and any accompanying documentation have been developed entirely at private expense. They are delivered and licensed as “commercial computer software.”  If this Software is acquired under the terms of a DOD or civilian agency contract, use, reproduction or disclosure of the Software by the Government is subject to the restrictions set forth in this License Agreement in accordance with 48 C.F.R. 227.7202 or 48 C.F.R. 12.212, respectively.

13.   NEGATION OF PARTNERSHIP
Company shall not become or be deemed a partner or a joint venturer with you by reason of the provisions of this license.
However, if you're a young virile female that shags like a minx, perhaps there are possibilities...

14.   GOVERNING LAW AND FORUM
Irrespective of the place of execution or performance, this License Agreement shall be governed and construed in accordance with the laws (or anarchy) of the Dicktatorial and Tyrannical Republic of RenegadeMinds applicable to agreements.  Any litigation to enforce or interpret the provisions of this License Agreement or the parties’ rights or obligations arising out of this License Agreement or the performance hereunder shall be maintained only in the courts in the City of My Choosing, RenegadeMinds, and the parties expressly consent to personal jurisdiction in such courts. In the event that you breach this Agreement or indicate your intention to breach this Agreement in any manner that violates or may violate the Company’s intellectual property rights or may cause continuing or irreparable harm to the Company, the Company may seek injunctive relief in any court of competent jurisdiction. The United Nations Convention on Contracts for the International Sale of Goods is specifically disclaimed.

15.   ENTIRE AGREEMENT 
Unless otherwise expressly agreed in writing, this License Agreement constitutes the sole and exclusive agreement between you and Company with regard to the Software, and supersedes all prior agreements, whether oral or written, and other communications between the parties relating to the subject matter set forth herein.
If you have any questions regarding this License Agreement or if you wish to request any information from Company, please contact the firm at the address or email address below. Please specify which language, English or Drunkanese, that you wish to receive correspondence in.

RenegadeMinds.com
#101 Sunwha, Yeoksam Dong, Kangnam Gu, 135-080
Seoul, Korea
Fax: +82-19-313-7399
Email: ********@renegademinds.com

Copyright © 2004 Renegade Minds. All rights reserved. RenegadeMinds, Renegade Minds, Soju Flower(s), Soju Garden, Fuck Satan, and a few other stupid things are trademarks of Renagade Minds.


Slow Down Music - Where I commit thought crimes...

Freedom is the right to be wrong, not the right to do wrong. - John Diefenbaker

Eóin

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #13 on: April 18, 2011, 08:37 PM »
But you don't define chronic, it would never stand up in court :D

40hz

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #14 on: April 18, 2011, 09:22 PM »
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
nice story 40hz!

Only in retrospect. That reprimand set the tone for the rest of my tenure with that company. I got passed over for a promotion twice because of it.

Moral: Next time you think of something really clever to pull at work: Don't.  :-\


mwb1100

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #15 on: April 18, 2011, 09:32 PM »
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
nice story 40hz!

Only in retrospect. That reprimand set the tone for the rest of my tenure with that company. I got passed over for a promotion twice because of it.

Moral: Next time you think of something really clever to pull at work: Don't.  :-\



Ouch!

wraith808

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #16 on: April 18, 2011, 09:43 PM »
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
nice story 40hz!

Only in retrospect. That reprimand set the tone for the rest of my tenure with that company. I got passed over for a promotion twice because of it.

Truthfully, if they passed me over for promotion because of that, and if that was my boss' response to it, it wouldn't be a place I'd want to work.  True, there are some lines, and there are times and places for it- but that response was more than a bit over the top if it wasn't a document for a client.

Renegade

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #17 on: April 18, 2011, 10:17 PM »
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
nice story 40hz!

Only in retrospect. That reprimand set the tone for the rest of my tenure with that company. I got passed over for a promotion twice because of it.

Truthfully, if they passed me over for promotion because of that, and if that was my boss' response to it, it wouldn't be a place I'd want to work.  True, there are some lines, and there are times and places for it- but that response was more than a bit over the top if it wasn't a document for a client.

I can't see the harm in it. It's a check to see if reviewers actually reviewed it. If nobody catches it, then you go back and delete it before it goes out, or ask to have it reviewed again, but this time properly.

@40Hz - Your boss there seems short-sighted.
Slow Down Music - Where I commit thought crimes...

Freedom is the right to be wrong, not the right to do wrong. - John Diefenbaker

40hz

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #18 on: April 18, 2011, 10:48 PM »
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
nice story 40hz!

Only in retrospect. That reprimand set the tone for the rest of my tenure with that company. I got passed over for a promotion twice because of it.

Truthfully, if they passed me over for promotion because of that, and if that was my boss' response to it, it wouldn't be a place I'd want to work.  True, there are some lines, and there are times and places for it- but that response was more than a bit over the top if it wasn't a document for a client.

I can't see the harm in it. It's a check to see if reviewers actually reviewed it. If nobody catches it, then you go back and delete it before it goes out, or ask to have it reviewed again, but this time properly.

@40Hz - Your boss there seems short-sighted.

It was a document for internal use by very senior management. It was also at a Fortune 500 company back when they used to take that designation very seriously.

My boss was a bit of a drudge with no sense of humor. But he was a fairly decent guy to work for most times. The getting passed over for promotion part was more because an advance copy of my report (which wasn't supposed to go out without approval) got sent over to the General Manager's office by special request prior to its final proofing and sign-off. My little joke got spotted by the GM's secretary, who made a snarly phone call to my boss about it. It was more her phone call than the joke itself that put me in the dog house. She was pretty well connected up on "mahogany row" because she'd been around forever and was personal friends with the company's founders. So nobody ever messed with her if they could avoid it.

Don't know if she actually said something to directly cause problems for me. But having the people I reported to know she didn't like me certainly didn't help my career much.

Either way, it was a dumb move on my part.

Live and learn. :)

------------------

@wraith - I agree with you about their reaction being over the top. And it not being a place I'd want to work at. Because the second time I missed out on a promotion (which all my cohorts were sure I'd receive) I decided I wanted to leave. Especially after I found out why I didn't get it.

But that's what ultimately got me out of finance and into computers, so no complaints.

In the end it was all for the best. Like so many things. :)

« Last Edit: April 20, 2011, 08:16 AM by 40hz »

app103

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #19 on: April 19, 2011, 12:33 AM »
Not entirely related to Eula's, but I've always love this line from many OS licenses

This software is provided by the copyright holders and contributors "as is" and any express or implied warranties, including, but not limited to, the implied warranties of merchantability and fitness for a particular purpose are disclaimed

When included in a Eula, the user is actually accepting that the program might not be fit for use nor do what it claims to do. From a legal point it makes sense, but imagine if the websites were up front- "This program does X, but I don't claim it's suitable to do X!"

A few of my applications contain this one:

Spoiler
DISCLAIMER:

This program is provided as is.
There are no claims made that it will work, not cause your pc
problems, etc etc.

Your mileage may vary, parental guidance is advised, call
before you dig, consult your doctor, action figures sold
separately, see a qualified tax professional, mind the gap, may
contain peanuts, no user serviceable parts inside, etc etc etc.

If this program causes your PC to explode, which in turn sets
your house on fire, killing your neighbor's dog, you assume all
responsibility for such and not me.

Use at your own risk!


Deozaan

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #20 on: April 19, 2011, 03:31 AM »
Looks like some people read the legal text. But not the proofreaders. This one is making the rounds on Twitter:

http://m.store.veriz...wireless.com/iphone/
« Last Edit: April 19, 2011, 03:51 AM by Deozaan »

MilesAhead

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #21 on: April 19, 2011, 04:46 PM »

Use at your own risk!


Your bottom line is similar to what I use. I just put "free for you to use at your own risk." Should be good enough catch all similar to selling a car "as is."


Renegade

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #22 on: April 19, 2011, 06:10 PM »
Looks like some people read the legal text. But not the proofreaders. This one is making the rounds on Twitter:

http://m.store.veriz...wireless.com/iphone/

I don't get it... I didn't see any legal text there.
Slow Down Music - Where I commit thought crimes...

Freedom is the right to be wrong, not the right to do wrong. - John Diefenbaker

Deozaan

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #23 on: April 19, 2011, 08:51 PM »
Looks like some people read the legal text. But not the proofreaders. This one is making the rounds on Twitter:

http://m.store.veriz...wireless.com/iphone/

I don't get it... I didn't see any legal text there.

Looks like they fixed it. Good thing I took a screengrab:

Verizon iPhone4 Legal Text.png

Renegade

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Re: Proof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)
« Reply #24 on: April 19, 2011, 09:39 PM »
Not reading an EULA can be VERY expensive.

I just put up some screenshots from my Android here:

http://cynic.me/2011...-ipad-2-a-mobile-ad/

$10 per week + $5 to "join". To get a *chance* to win an iPad... OUCH~!

The ad in the game:

ipad-2-ad-in-Farm-Tower.pngProof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)

The "contest" screen. (composite with comments)

ControversialLegalAdAndroid.pngProof That People Cannot Read (EULAs)

And you KNOW damn well that they're COUNTING on you NOT scrolling down enough or reading the terms. You THINK that you're entering a contest/lottery, but you're not. You're signing up for some stuff. I think that stuff has been in the news before. It's not new.
Slow Down Music - Where I commit thought crimes...

Freedom is the right to be wrong, not the right to do wrong. - John Diefenbaker