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Stoic Joker:
4. Labratory staff occasionally get attached to the rats...Q: What's the difference between a bad lawyer and a good lawyer?
-wraith808 (March 11, 2011, 09:47 AM)
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The US Center for Disease Control has announced they will no longer be using rats in their scientific research. Going forward, all experiments will be conducted using attorneys.
;)
The reason for this change in protocol is threefold.
After an extensive study, the CDC concluded that:
1. Attorneys are easily bought, and available in almost unlimited supply.
2. Close observation has proven beyond any doubt that they are completely indifferent to pain and suffering.
3. The CDC occasionally conducts behavioral studies. And when it comes to individual behaviors, there are some which are so dirty, and utterly disgusting, that a rat will flat out refuse to do them.
-40hz (March 11, 2011, 03:01 PM)
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4. Labratory staff occasionally get attached to the rats...
wraith808:
Hey! My post disappeared!
Q: What's the difference between a bad lawyer and a good lawyer?
-wraith808 (March 11, 2011, 09:47 AM)
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The US Center for Disease Control has announced they will no longer be using rats in their scientific research. Going forward, all experiments will be conducted using attorneys.
;)
-40hz (March 11, 2011, 03:01 PM)
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I might not be able to out-pun chris, but surely I can out-joke you...
Q: What's the problem with lawyer jokes?
SpoilerA: Lawyers don't think they're funny, and no one else thinks they're jokes!
Deozaan:
I know an attorney that would agree. He says: Justice has it's place in the courtroom.-40hz (March 11, 2011, 09:10 AM)
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A Supreme Court Justice would disagree: "This is a court of law, young man, not a court of justice." - Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
40hz:
I know an attorney that would agree. He says: Justice has it's place in the courtroom.-40hz (March 11, 2011, 09:10 AM)
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A Supreme Court Justice would disagree: "This is a court of law, young man, not a court of justice." - Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
-Deozaan (March 11, 2011, 04:17 PM)
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I think he meant it in the same way a 13th century baron believed a lively and ongoing debate about the rights of his tenants had a place in village discourse. And that place was up on a scaffold, begging for mercy, with a hangman in attendance. ;)
---------
re: Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr. - Interesting guy. And a colorful S.C. Justice. But way too cynical for his (or our) own good at times.
This was the same judge that authored the majority opinion in a case (Buck v Bell) supporting a State's right to sterilize someone deemed an "imbecile" (i.e. mental capabilities below what was deemed an acceptable level of intelligence) against their will. He justified his decision by closing with this less frequently quoted statement:
Three generations of imbeciles are enough.
Less than 20 years later, justices from the United States, along with their counterparts from Britain, France, and the Soviet Union would sentence Dr Karl Brandt, Viktor Brack, and seven other Nazi officials to death for their role in the infamous "T4" euthanasia program. T4 documented and systematically murdered somewhere around 200,000 physically or mentally handicapped people deemed unfit to live in human society.
Apparently some other people shared Justice Holmes pragmatic vision of how to make a more perfect world. :(
Nice to see the rest of the world was a bit more interested in justice than in the letter of law. :)
40hz:
I might not be able to out-pun chris, -wraith808 (March 11, 2011, 03:33 PM)
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Few can. :Thmbsup:
but surely I can out-joke you...
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Most do. ;D
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