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Why I Don't Want an iPad for Christmas

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Deozaan:
So my mom got an iPad for Christmas. I played around with it and tried to give it a fair shake. It's actually pretty cool technology and definitely a fun gadget to play around with. But in the end, as with every other Apple product I've used, I didn't like it.

It's really a misnomer that Apple products are intuitive and easy to use. There were quite a few times when I was puzzled about how to accomplish something that should be a no-brainer.

1. Browsing the app store, I found a game I loved, and when I saw it had 4 player multiplayer on 1 device, decided to buy it for my mom as a present (so I could play it, of course!). I saw the description, price, and lots of details and reviews about the game (Chu Chu Rocket) but I couldn't figure out how to buy the darn thing! Where's the big "Buy Now!" or "Install" button? I clicked on the game title, on the picture, scrolled all around the page looking for the buy button. Perplexed, I finally clicked on the price, which does not look anything like a button, and then was given the opportunity to okay the sale. But it didn't ask me for any payment details. So now my mom's credit card (or whatever) will be charged for the gift I gave her. ARGH!

2. Since it's essentially a giant iPhone without the phone, browsing websites will automatically take you to the Mobile phone version of sites (that are smart enough to do that), which is stupid and annoying because a lot of the mobile versions of sites are limited in what they allow you to see or do. ARGH! (Though to be fair, I imagine Android tablets have this same problem.)

3. I really noticed the lack of a "back" or "cancel" button on the device. For instance, I was using the Fandango app to browse local movie showtimes, and I clicked the button to watch a movie preview. But my mom's internet isn't that great so it wouldn't load fast enough to stream. So I ended up stuck on a blank screen with no back button to get back to the Fandango app. Touching the screen wouldn't bring up any options, not even playback options like pause, rewind, seek, etc. I could press the "Home" button to take me back to the "desktop" but if I relaunched Fandango it would remember where I was and just take me back to the black screen. Where's the smurfing back/cancel button to go out of the video preview and back to the app? ARGH!

4. The iPad's iPod mode is retarded. Now, I've never owned an iPod and don't like using them because the "easy and intuitive" wheel thing never works for me. I have to spin and spin and spin just to try to get it to move one place, but it doesn't go anywhere. Finally when it does move, it goes several spaces and I have to repeat the process all over again, but in the opposite direction, to try to get back to the option I want. So anyway, I don't use iPods, and I don't use iTunes, so maybe this is why this seemed so stupid to me, but while trying to select some music to play, I clicked the Albums button at the bottom of the screen and it popped up a little box showing a bunch of albums, and I selected one and told a song to play. Fine, easy, great! But after that as I wanted to browse the rest of the music, nothing on the screen would respond to anything except that little window with the current album open. I tried clicking off of the window to close it, but that didn't work. I looked for an X or close button (which other iPad apps use on popup windows like that one), but there was none. I clicked all over trying to get that little window to close so I could use the darn machine but there was no clear or visible way to get it to go away. I don't remember for sure now, but I think I ended up clicking on the album name to get it to go away. ARGH!

It doesn't make sense. It's not consistent, and my "computer illiterate" mom who thinks Apple products are great because they're "so easy they're perfect for stupid people like [her]" still has to ask me questions about how to do stuff. Then when I try to figure it out for her I can't because it's so smurfing stupidly designed it doesn't make any sense.

ARGH! I hate Apple products so much!

Those Android tablets can't come soon enough!

Stoic Joker:
That sounds like a great (from-the-streets) human interest story for KewlAid...

nudone:
The perfect Christmas present... not receiving an iPad. I think many of us should be grateful for not receiving one this year.

f0dder:
But it didn't ask me for any payment details. So now my mom's credit card (or whatever) will be charged for the gift I gave her. ARGH!-Deozaan (December 26, 2010, 12:58 PM)
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Yeah, iirc it's tied to your iTunes account and auto-draws from the associated credit card. Makes it so eeeeeeasy, especially for the teenagers that don't have a grasp of money yet >_<

Where's the smurfing back/cancel button to go out of the video preview and back to the app? ARGH!-Deozaan (December 26, 2010, 12:58 PM)
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Oh, that's easy - you just have to slide two fingers across the screen diagonally while standing like this:





I have to spin and spin and spin just to try to get it to move one place, but it doesn't go anywhere. Finally when it does move, it goes several spaces and I have to repeat the process all over again, but in the opposite direction, to try to get back to the option I want.-Deozaan (December 26, 2010, 12:58 PM)
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Yeah, it's the same for me. It's as user friendly as Mario skating across ice blocks.

I tried clicking off of the window to close it, but that didn't work. I looked for an X or close button (which other iPad apps use on popup windows like that one), but there was none. I clicked all over trying to get that little window to close so I could use the darn machine but there was no clear or visible way to get it to go away. I don't remember for sure now, but I think I ended up clicking on the album name to get it to go away. ARGH! It doesn't make sense. It's not consistent,-Deozaan (December 26, 2010, 12:58 PM)
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HEATHEN! Apples interfaces are intuitive and consistent! How daaaaare you utter such nonsense?! ;)

Renegade:
In all fairness to the iPad, the store example isn't a problem with the iPad. It's a problem with the iTunes store being completely retarded. You could try to browse it on anything, even Windows, and it's no less moronic.

Try sorting in the Apple Ape Store. Ooops... Can't do it.

There is no salvation for the app store because it's fundamental principles are wrong.

Actually, come to think of it, the app store is very much like roads here. Drive down a residential street and you'll hit a speed bump every 50 or 100 m with choke points at every intersection. i.e. They're not designed to help you get from point A to point B; they're designed to "allow" you to get from point A to point B with as much difficulty as possible. The app store is the same. It's not the car that sucks. It's the roads. Same for the iPad there -- it's the store that sucks beyond comprehension.

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