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Author Topic: Signs You're a Crappy Programmer (and don't know it)  (Read 7340 times)

app103

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Signs You're a Crappy Programmer (and don't know it)
« on: December 01, 2007, 03:26 AM »
You know those crappy programmers who don’t know they are crappy? You know, they think they're pretty good, they spout off the same catch phrase rhetoric they've heard some guru say and they know lots of rules about the "correct" way to do things? Yet their own work seems seriously lacking given all the expertise they supposedly have? You don’t know any programmers like that? Come one, you know, the guys who are big on dogma but short on understanding. No, doesn’t sound familiar?



Renegade

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Re: Signs You're a Crappy Programmer (and don't know it)
« Reply #1 on: December 01, 2007, 08:25 PM »
That was a good list.

I know that sometimes I write just total crap. That's usually because I'm trying to get something done quickly and ignore the best way to do things. Most often those aren't for release though. I take more time when working towards a release, but I still do take shortcuts from time to time.

The way the images are done in the Anti-Christ Hunter isn't the best way at all. I've statically added all the images instead of having a dynamic method to do it. Not the best way, but a quick and easy way. It would have been better to do it dynamically so that images can be easily added.

Often there's no "right" way to do things, just different ways. It all depends on what you need to do.

I recently corrected someone on a programming issue where they were dealing with a URL, but treated it as a string. The logic behind that is IMMENSE and very difficult. The best way to do it is to cast the URL as a URI type and then deal with it. You have MUCH LESS code then, less prone to bugs, it's more reliable, and a LOT less work. Treating it as a string is in every way inferior. So sometimes there are situations where there is a clearly superior way to do things.

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Ralf Maximus

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Re: Signs You're a Crappy Programmer (and don't know it)
« Reply #2 on: December 01, 2007, 09:04 PM »
TOP TEN SIGNS YOU'RE A CRAPPY PROGRAMMER

10. You remove all the comments you find because they take up valuable RAM.

9. You've locked yourself out of your own garage because you've misprogrammed the remote.

8. You discover all the error handlers in the project are named after you.

7. Instead of errors, your compiler generates terrorist alerts.

6. Your proudest achievement: Lead Developer for Windows ME Microsoft Bob.

5. The title on your business cards: "Shit For Brains".

4. You have your own security detail -- as protection from the QA team.

3. Your idea of "optimization" is to delete the stuff you don't understand.

2. You get flowers and expensive gifts after each software release.  From the competition.

1. Your version of "Hello World" crashes.
« Last Edit: December 01, 2007, 10:19 PM by Ralf Maximus »

app103

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Re: Signs You're a Crappy Programmer (and don't know it)
« Reply #3 on: December 01, 2007, 09:42 PM »
6. Your proudest achievement: Lead Developer for Windows ME.

 >:(

Ralf...
Stop making me defend WinME. Go pick on MS Bob, or Vista, or WinCE 3.0/PocketPC 2000. Leave my faithful, hard working ME alone or I'll send an army of ME-tans to your house to beat you with scallions. :-*


Ralf Maximus

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Re: Signs You're a Crappy Programmer (and don't know it)
« Reply #4 on: December 01, 2007, 10:20 PM »
You know, you're right. 

Microsoft Bob sucked harder than anything else I've ever seen.  Bad idea, poorly executed, for a market that didn't exist.

Besides, "Microsoft Bob" is funnier.  Thanks; I changed it.

jgpaiva

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Re: Signs You're a Crappy Programmer (and don't know it)
« Reply #5 on: December 04, 2007, 06:31 PM »
I'm now wondering who would be correct. My professors which keep evangelizing a few of the bullets on that list, or that guy.
I am in disagreement with both the "You model all your code in UML before you write it." and the "OMG! PATTERNS!" lines.
I mean, i don't think modelling ALL the code in UML is important (i hate UML!) but it definitelly is useful, and my professors keep evangelizing it.
As for patterns... I'm not sure what he means. Does he mean that patterns are a bad thing?

f0dder

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Re: Signs You're a Crappy Programmer (and don't know it)
« Reply #6 on: December 04, 2007, 06:46 PM »
Having to UML everything is silly... having to document your projects makes sense for anything that isn't tiny, though.

I believe his pattern-line refers to the people that want to solve everything with patterns, try to apply them everywhere, etc...
- carpe noctem

Lashiec

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Re: Signs You're a Crappy Programmer (and don't know it)
« Reply #7 on: December 05, 2007, 11:47 AM »
UML is useful for big projects, but if they pretend that you have to model every little app you write, it would be a good idea for them to look again what UML is for. Besides, it's weird that all your teachers evangelize it, not even my software engineering teacher did it, despite being the UML resident expert here.

Another completely different thing is planning before you start to type code, that's a good practice.

Oh well, I suppose they want you to be sure what's the task of a computer engineer and all that, ya know the usual competition between engineers and coders ;D
« Last Edit: December 05, 2007, 11:59 AM by Lashiec »

Ralf Maximus

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Re: Signs You're a Crappy Programmer (and don't know it)
« Reply #8 on: December 05, 2007, 11:59 AM »
It's time for Agile UML: Write the use cases while you code!

Deozaan

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Re: Signs You're a Crappy Programmer (and don't know it)
« Reply #9 on: December 05, 2007, 12:26 PM »
I'm now wondering who would be correct. My professors which keep evangelizing a few of the bullets on that list, or that guy.
I am in disagreement with both the "You model all your code in UML before you write it." and the "OMG! PATTERNS!" lines.
I mean, i don't think modelling ALL the code in UML is important (i hate UML!) but it definitelly is useful, and my professors keep evangelizing it.
As for patterns... I'm not sure what he means. Does he mean that patterns are a bad thing?

The comments say clearly that UML is useful, but trying to map ALL your code in UML is overkill.

As for patterns, it isn't clear to me if you understood this, but he's talking about Design Patterns, and as f0dder said, trying to apply them to EVERY problem. Design patterns, like UML, are quite useful when used appropriately.

Deozaan

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Re: Signs You're a Crappy Programmer (and don't know it)
« Reply #10 on: December 05, 2007, 12:27 PM »
TOP TEN SIGNS YOU'RE A CRAPPY PROGRAMMER
1. Your version of "Hello World" crashes.

 ;D :Thmbsup: :P :) ;D ;D :P :-* :Thmbsup: