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1426  Main Area and Open Discussion / Living Room / Re: One year on with Windows 7 on: May 13, 2013, 10:11:40 AM
Sorry, I didn't intend to imply that you needed to measure performance to (say) compete with anyone. I never use metrics for that either (couldn't care less really). No, I just use the metrics to establish how much of an improvement I might have been able to have achieved in something.
I got a great deal of satisfaction from tweaking up the laptops (both were heavily discounted/refurbished models), knowing that I had been able to get some significant improvement - one was for me, the other for my daughter Lily (hers is also a standby for me). Lily is now 11½ years old, but she had been hammering her laptop with some graphic-intensive games, including SIMS games (she especially likes designing her female SIMS clothes, and designing houses). She later might knock up some of the more simple SIMS dress designs she had created, on her sewing machine, for herself or some of her friends. She wants me to start selling them on an internet auction site, together with a range of cloth bag designs she knocked up. (I told her I'd do it for a commission.)
The RAM upgrade taught me a few things, and afterwards Lily was very pleased with the reduced latency on her laptop, and I with mine.

Bit of a digression:
1427  Main Area and Open Discussion / General Software Discussion / Re: Paul's Extreme Sound Stretch - Aaawwweeesssooommmeee on: May 13, 2013, 08:18:19 AM
I had listened to:

Here's one I did with PaulStretch: Harp upwards stretch.wav (2.3Mb)
(It's just a quick riffle upwards across the harp strings, slowed down.)

And here are some interesting Musical Illusions
I find the "Phantom Words" one intriguing. Amazing what our brains can make up in an effort to make sense out of some sounds. What do you hear?
1428  Main Area and Open Discussion / Living Room / Re: Free and Fast ‘Roof2Roof’ Internet Available in Richmond, CA on: May 12, 2013, 06:55:36 PM
Yes. Me too.    smiley
Wish I had access to this.
1429  Main Area and Open Discussion / Living Room / Re: One year on with Windows 7 on: May 12, 2013, 11:02:23 AM
^^That's an interesting monster you have there. Makes me rather envious - as a confirmed laptop-only user nowadays, I no longer get the experience or fun of building or reconfiguring the hardware in a desktop PC like I used to.
Yes, the WEI is a bit of a rough-and-ready rule-of-thumb, but since it came with the OS, it was easy enough for me to use as a standard basis of comparison between As-built and As-modified. I always like to get some metrics on performance, but in this case the most important user metric (latency) was not measurable with what we had. The improvement was perceived but not measured, so not really provable.

Your PC might be blindingly faster, or better-performing than a lesser beast, but you wouldn't necessarily be able to prove it without some comparative metrics either. It really comes down to things such as, for example, the effect on overall performance of (say) throughput rates on specific complex tasks.
I think the WEI was probably intended to give one some pointers to this, and to help one to identify some areas of potential bottlenecks, which it probably does with the LCDs.

Metrics are important for performance measurement, but the user experience is often the most important.
Years ago I used to do a comparative test on sportscars to get an average time out of 10 tries at 0 to 60mph and 0-100mph with two people inside (the driver and the stopwatch-holder). That figure would be a product of a complex function probably including things such as, for example, brake horse power, final drive (differential) gearing ratio, power-to-weight ratio, traction, and suspension spring "tramping".
As a metric, though the 0-60mph time was quite a useful metric - an addition to the "experience index" for a sportscar driver - some of the unmeasurable things were probably more important.
I recall that, on doing a major engine conversion on one road-going sportscar, which made a power-to-weight ratio improvement (doubled the power output, knocked about 50lbs off the engine weight by moving from cast iron to sandcast or diecast aluminium alloy), changed the weight distribution from front-heavy to near 50-50% (engine moved further amidships), not only did the car run more quietly and feel safer at speed (better traction and roadholding) but it also shaved something like 3+ seconds off its average 0-60mph time and pushed up achievable top speed from about 100mph to 137.5mph, with happy high-speed cruising at 110-125mph. The user experience was described as "electrifying"!

As an experiment, it might be interesting to get a WEI measure for your PC (AS-IS), then install (say) Windows 8, and then rerun the WEI to see what difference (if any) there might be...    Wink
1430  Main Area and Open Discussion / Living Room / Re: Internet freedoms restrained - SOPA/PIPA/OPEN/ACTA/CETA/PrECISE-related updates on: May 12, 2013, 09:13:05 AM
Good news. Not so much a restraint of Internet/IT Freedom, but a removal of a potential or threatened restraint - in New Zealand, at least.
A news report from the NZ Herald on 2013-05-09: IT industry backs software patent change

ARS Technica reports on it as: New Zealand government closes door on software patents
This week, New Zealand Commerce Minister Craig Foss bowed to pressure from software patent opponents. The latest language states clearly that "a computer program is not an invention," and is not eligible for patent protection. The Labour Party called it "a humiliating back down."

The decision was hailed by InternetNZ, a non-profit organization that promotes an open Internet. "Patenting software would not only make the continued development of the Internet more difficult, it would reduce innovation and could well stymie interoperability of various software platforms," the group wrote on Thursday.

New Zealand's Institute of IT Professionals also praised the move. "If you look at the New Zealand market, you would be hard pressed to find many people that were thinking patents would be a good idea," the organization's chief executive Paul Matthews told the New Zealand Herald.
1431  Main Area and Open Discussion / Living Room / Re: One year on with Windows 7 on: May 12, 2013, 07:54:51 AM
Well, I first got Win7-64 Home Premium with a new HP ENVY 14 laptop (i7 CPU) purchased just over 2 years ago, and I invested quite a bit of time in either getting it to run the way I wanted, or adapting my user behaviours to it, as you seem to have done.
A short while after buying the HP ENVY, I got a second Win7-64 Home Premium with a new DELL Inspiron laptop (i5 CPU), and essentially built it up using my experience with the HP ENVY as a template.
When I had them both running pretty much OK, after checking/recording their performance, I upgraded both laptops with more RAM and this was the result (reported on in a separate post on DC forum - here).


On both laptops, the additional RAM made a significant difference to perceived latency (everything seemed to run faster/more smoothly) from the user perspective. In terms of measurable performance though, as you can see, there was not much more we could do to speed up the Windows base performance measure in the HP ENVY - its performance LCD (lowest common denominator) seems to be the hard drive, which is already a 7200rpm spec., and, in the case of the DELL Inspiron, its performance LCD seems to be it's Aero performance, which, at a guess, could be a firmware efficiency issue in the display controller - i.e., nothing which otherwise might be fixable. (?)    tellme

It would be interesting to know what your Windows base performance measures were/are before and after any hardware changes.
1432  Main Area and Open Discussion / General Software Discussion / Re: General brainstorming for Note-taking software on: May 12, 2013, 06:58:27 AM
This is what I do now.
  • I created an 'app' from the 'create new gdocs' link. It placed an icon on the desktop. I assigned a global shortcut to it. It takes 1-2 seconds to create a new note (a gdoc). Not as fast as simplenote or resophnotes, but it'll do
  • Create a new gdocs when the inspiration comes, with the global shortcut
  • Install syncdocs, so you have a local copy to every gdocs you create. Make sure that explorer index the syndocs folder. Then, when it's time to search, open an explorer window; the explorer search is damn fast, indexes the text, and the results are displayed with context; they are better than how onenote does it
Convoluted, but reliable, crossplatform, and full featured.
requires only easy to find software (your file manager, gdocs).
Everything works on and offline. (create new .doc instead of gdocs when offline)
The gdocs editor is way better than any of the native .doc editors (or rtf, or odt)

Interesting, I had been using a similar approach, but I stopped using SyncDocs as it seemed redundant (for my purposes) in the face of the latest incarnation of Gdrive (Google Drive). So I just settle for enabling Gdrive on my computer, and having my documents in a Gdrive folder on disk, where they are automatically synced up to the Cloud (Gdrive). Win7 indexes the documents for search.

Where you say "...the results are displayed with context; they are better than how onenote does it", do you mean how Win7 indexes the OneNotes Notebooks' content documents for search? I thought that worked the same  - i.e., not differently, so neither better nor worse.
At any rate, that seemed to be the case when I was using OneNotes 2007, but since I have been using OneNotes 2013, I find the syncing of a NoteBook in almost real-time to the Cloud on SkyDrive works perfectly well, and it's still indexed by Win7.
1433  Main Area and Open Discussion / Living Room / Re: Internet freedoms restrained - SOPA/PIPA/OPEN/ACTA/CETA/PrECISE-related updates on: May 12, 2013, 06:27:59 AM
As usual, Falkvinge nails down a rather pertinent point: United States Government Shows The World It Doesn’t Understand The Internet, Claims “Ownership” Of Specific Files.
I hadn't realised the US Government was doing this, until I read the post.
(Copied below sans embedded hyperlinks/images.)
The United States Department of Defense has “claimed ownership” of CAD drawings of a plastic, printable pistol. In doing so, they apparently believe they can stop the files from existing. The result is obviously the complete opposite, which calls into strong question the judgment and ability of United States Government to set Internet policy at all.

When the public received the means of production through 3D printing, it was obvious that you could no longer regulate which objects were allowed to exist and which didn’t, just as you can no longer regulate distribution of information. Well, obvious to anybody but bureaucrats in governments who insist they cannot lose any control.

The think tank Defense Distributed has been developing 3D printer drawings for weapons parts for some time. First, they published drawings for vital parts for the AR-15 rifle (the civilian version of the military Armalite M-16) which could be printed by anybody in their homes, and then moved on to creating an all-plastic weapon which could be printed by anybody without dependence on other manufacturers, the “Liberator” in 17 parts.

This was not a matter of breaking the law of weapons regulations – this was a matter of the law having become unenforceable and obsolete through advancements in technology.

Late yesterday, the United States’ Department of Defense contacted Defense Distributed and told them that the United States government were seizing the drawings and claimed ownership of the files. This move was utterly ridiculous, as the drawings had already been published. The immediate effect was that Defense Distributed complied, and everybody else started seeding the files like wildfire. This is cause for concern – not the fact that the files exist, but that the US Government can be so completely boneheaded to think they can prevent information from existing by saying so.

The pistol drawings exist in the form of a magnet link which picks the file from whoever has them, with no central repository. The other files from Defense Distributed have also been censored by the United States government, which contain vital (printable) parts for an AR-15 and similar things, but these files are similarly available through a simple link. Predictably, their distribution has gone absolutely stratospheric.

We have long seen how the US Government is completely boneheaded and unfit to set and shape Internet policy, due to their simply not understanding of what the Internet is and how it works. This episode underscores that conclusion strongly.

Part of the reason the US doesn’t understand the Internet is because of the country’s vastly substandard infrastructure, since they have allowed cable companies and telcos to dictate what the Internet should look like (and the US is therefore far, far behind countries like Romania and Lithuania – countries that were considered near-developing countries 20 years ago, a timeframe that policymakers in Washington are apparently stuck in. We’ll be returning to that in a separate article.)

In any case, this episode shows that the US government is simply unfit to even have an opinion on shaping the future Internet.
1434  Main Area and Open Discussion / General Software Discussion / Re: Firefox Extensions: Your favorite or most useful on: May 12, 2013, 06:21:34 AM
I believe it is a file manager that can tag every downloaded file, and replace Evernote
- all from within Firefox.
Looks rather intriguing. Shall give it a whirl, and see.
I posted a comment about the FF add-on mentioned above - TagSpaces - here (in the context of Tag standards): On the lack of standardisation in "tagging".
TagSpaces itself seems like quite well-made software, but I am unsure as to whether I could make much use of it in its present state.
1435  Main Area and Open Discussion / Living Room / Animatable Wigglegrams - Jeffrey Friedl's Blog on: May 11, 2013, 06:23:12 AM
These are beautifully done images. Not your typical "Lenticular photographs" - Jeffrey Friedl's Blog. Beautiful subject too.
I'd never see this sort of image before.
1436  Main Area and Open Discussion / Living Room / Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content] on: May 11, 2013, 06:01:13 AM
@kyrathaba: Poor squirrel. Yes. "Ouch!"
Hey, nice gardens there.
1437  Main Area and Open Discussion / Living Room / On the lack of standardisation in "tagging" . on: May 11, 2013, 01:21:48 AM
On the lack of standardisation in "tagging" .
I use the Firefox add-on Scrapbook to capture/save web-page snippets or whole webpages.
Scrapbook is very handy as I can sort/search through the saved data using the Scrapbook index/search. I could also use the Win7 index/search function, though it is usually easiest/fastest to search using Scrapbook, as I can then open the page material, and add text notes (which are also searchable) or stick-it type notes (which do not seem to be searchable), all within the browser.

Though the Scrapbook saved file formats are easily accessed using a browser, I have been exploring the use of .mht and .maff files as alternative ways of capturing/archiving the web page data, using Mozilla Archive Format or UnMHT.
The .mht (stands for MIME HTML, I gather) format standard seems to have been around for a while, but is relatively little-used. There is an MHT viewer in Win7, and Win7 also has the Problem Step Recorder - which generates an .mht file and will even email it if you want - if you inspect the contents of the file, you will see that it is set up as an email. You can read .mht files in the MHT viewer or in a browser (but not necessarily always with identical results!).

When you go exploring, you invariably risk discovering something that you did not know about before. I stumbled upon something described as a potential "alternative" to using Evernote, though the alternative was not of itself of much interest to me. The alternative was in the shape of the FF add-on TagSpaces, but the way in which it enabled you to explore and tag your files - i.e., including .mht files - in a "view" of the directories on the hard disk - was interesting.
For tagging, it simply appended the tag to the filename, enclosed in square brackets.

There are probably over a hundred metadata fields (columns) that you could use for files in Win7, and you can view these as columns in Windows Explorer. Why did the developer not use one of those? Well, I haven't asked the question of the author, but I presume the answer would be "It's just too hard due to the multiplicity and inconsistency of standards, so I developed my own standard using the filename", or something along those lines.
For example, this tagging method is applied by TagSpaces to the filenames of image files also, thus avoiding using the the "Keywords" IPTC metadata field in the image file for tagging.
So, thinking of the image files, I checked it up and established that Google Picasa uses the Keywords field for tagging and it uses other image file metadata fields for other things - e.g., the face recognition tags are apparently now put (or can be put) into an "XMP" tag. (I don't know much about XMP.)
But it seems that both Picasa and Windows Live Photo Gallery use those photo-recognition and other tags too, but not always in the same way, because they are apparently each based on a different "interpretation" of the relevant standards.

In fact, this image tagging might not conform to a consistent standard by any significant group of photo-tagging software. I am unsure whether this would be deliberate.
If you want to read more on this, refer these links (the last one is probably the most informative):

It's rather a confused picture, and some of it seems to explain why I had to invest many hours in restoring tags to my image files a couple of years back, following a Picasa update. Yet it also indicates that Picasa would seem to be one of the more "stable" in this regard.    ohmy

"The nice thing about standards is that you have so many to choose from."
 - Andrew S. Tanenbaum, Computer Networks, 2nd ed., p. 254.
1438  Main Area and Open Discussion / Living Room / Free and Fast ‘Roof2Roof’ Internet Available in Richmond, CA on: May 10, 2013, 09:07:15 PM
Lucky people in Richmond! (Wait for the ISPs to start protesting...)
(Copied below sans embedded hyperlinks/images.)
Free and Fast ‘Roof2Roof’ Internet Available in Richmond, CA
Posted on May 8, 2013 by brewster
Image: Antenna on 2512 Florida Avenue, Richmond to offer free Internet for those with antennas on their roofs

As a free service to Richmond residents, the Internet Archive has installed a 70 foot tower on its physical archive building in Richmond California to offer free and fast Internet to those with roofs that can see the tower.  Those wanting to use this community wireless service would need to buy and install a directional antenna on their roof to connect, but from then on their Internet access is free.   In this way we call it a ‘free and fast roof2roof network’ since it will generally not reach people’s laptops inside houses.   The signal will work at over 1 mile to a suitable antenna with line-of-site to our tower.    Wifi receivers with directional antennas can cost as little as one hundred to two hundred dollars from vendors like ubiquiti.

Gayle McLaughlin, mayor of Richmond, when we told her about this, said: “We are dedicated to closing the digital divide in Richmond. Providing free access to the internet is a great benefit for our residents helping us create a better and more equitable city!”

Image: End-user window mountable antenna for connecting to Internet Archive's tower

We have achieved 80 megabits per second in both directions with this technology, so this should support many people’s normal Internet use.    Typical commercial Internet access runs at 1/10 this speed, so the fastest residential Internet in Richmond will likely be this system.    Currently average of 4 users are connect to our tower but we hope this will grow.

We hope that intrepid individuals will connect to this system in a way we have called “tier 3″.   While we do not have the budget to provide tech support, we hope that entrepreneurs, enthusiasts, or non-profit organizations will help others get online.

Another step would be to expand the number of houses and buildings that could connect to this system by putting repeater antennas on high locations to expand the number of rooftops with line-of-site to this backbone.    If you are an owner of a tall building or structure and are interested in participating, please let us know by writing to info@archive.org.   We would be interested in paying for the equipment and do the installation for a couple of well placed locations.

Location: Height 70′ above ground level, 2512 Florida Avenue, Richmond, CA.  Some more details on the equipment.   The network identifiers (SSIDs) include ‘archive.org’ in their names, and the 2.4GHz ones are open with no password or encryption.  Thank you to Ralf Muehlen for setting up this system, and thank you to the City of Richmond for allowing an tower to be installed with no delay or hassle.

Onward to a Free and Fast Internet for All!
1439  Main Area and Open Discussion / Living Room / Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content] on: May 09, 2013, 11:26:18 AM
Psychology 101 - Group behaviour.
If you start with a cage containing five monkeys and inside the cage, hang a banana on a string from the top and then you place a set of stairs under the banana, before long a monkey will go to the stairs and climb toward the banana.

As soon as he touches the stairs, you spray all the other monkeys with cold water.

After a while another monkey makes an attempt with same result ...  all the other monkeys are sprayed with cold water.  Pretty soon when another monkey tries to climb the stairs, the other monkeys will try to prevent it.

Now, put the cold water away.

Remove one monkey from the cage and replace it with a new one.

The new monkey sees the banana and attempts to climb the stairs.  To his shock, all of the other monkeys beat the crap out of him.
After another attempt and attack, he knows that if he tries to climb the stairs he will be assaulted.

Next, remove another of the original five monkeys, replacing it with a new one.

The newcomer goes to the stairs and is attacked.  The previous newcomer takes part in the punishment......  with enthusiasm, because he is now part of the "team".

Then, replace a third original monkey with a new one, followed by the fourth, then the fifth.  Every time the newest monkey takes to the stairs, he is attacked.

Now, the monkeys that are beating him up have no idea why they were not permitted to climb the stairs.  Neither do they know why they are participating in the beating of the newest monkey.

Finally, having replaced all of the original monkeys, none of the remaining monkeys will have ever been sprayed with cold water.
Nevertheless, not one of the monkeys will try to climb the stairway for the banana.

Why, you ask?  Because in their minds...that is the way it has always been!

This, my friends, is how bureaucracy operates...  and this is why, from time to time:
ALL of the monkeys need to be REPLACED AT THE SAME TIME.
1440  Main Area and Open Discussion / Living Room / Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content] on: May 09, 2013, 11:15:44 AM
Kylie Minogue, Robbie Williams and Elton John were walking over a bridge.

Kylie trips, and gets her head jammed between the railings.
Without a sideways glance, Robbie pulls aside her G-String, and bonks her senseless!

He stands back and tells Elton, "Your turn!"

Elton bursts into tears.

"What's up?" asks Robbie.

Elton sobs, "My head won't fit through the railings!"
1441  DonationCoder.com Software / Post New Requests Here / Re: SkyDrive Bookmarklet on: May 07, 2013, 03:43:39 PM
I was browsing in the Chrome apps store and did a search on "skydrive" extensions and came up with some potentially useful hits. Had you tried that?
If not, try here: https://chrome.google.com...earch-extensions/skydrive
1442  Main Area and Open Discussion / General Software Discussion / Re: Collaborative online outliner recommendation? on: May 07, 2013, 03:38:56 PM
...I'm not sure if that works for others who have been invited to the party - or just for the author.
You could set up a doc and invite some guinea-pigs to view/edit it and see.
1443  Main Area and Open Discussion / General Software Discussion / Re: Collaborative online outliner recommendation? on: May 07, 2013, 08:48:33 AM
Not sure whether the EtherPad sites might be of interest:
• + I think (not sure) Google docs built on that technology.
1444  Main Area and Open Discussion / General Software Discussion / Re: General brainstorming for Note-taking software on: May 07, 2013, 08:25:57 AM
Atlantis looks good as a word/text processor, but for general note-taking software, I think InfoSelect v8 (not the v9 or v10) is still hard to beat, and OneNote would be tops, because your notes can include text, images with embedded text, files, and voice audio (even the lyrics from songs in MP3 files) - which are all searchable from the Windows 7 Search/Index function, and from within OneNote itself - see here: Microsoft OneNote 2007 - some experiential Tips & Tricks

From the reviews, Scrivener seems hard to beat as a sophisticated creative writing tool, though I have not tried it yet.
1445  Main Area and Open Discussion / General Software Discussion / Re: General brainstorming for Note-taking software on: May 07, 2013, 07:54:08 AM
@tomos: I googled "Atlantis note-taking software" and got a lot of links, some of them look like dubious download sites for what seemed to be non-existant versions (per the real author's site, when I found it) of Altlantis.
One of these sites said it was "Rising Sun Solutions Inc." the author's site, except you could see it wasn't their site.
I finally found what looked like the real author's site by googling "Rising Sun Solutions Inc." and it is: http://www.atlantiswordprocessor.com/en/

Looks like an interesting product wth a 30-day free trial before the licence expires - Registration is US$35.00.

Some of the dubious links:
1446  Main Area and Open Discussion / Living Room / Re: New PC double-take on: May 07, 2013, 07:26:54 AM
^^ Yes, what @x16wda said.
1447  Main Area and Open Discussion / Living Room / Re: Adobe drops the gauntlet - going forward it's cloud - or nothing. on: May 07, 2013, 01:16:22 AM
Take a trip back in time, to when the producers dictated to their customers. (Did they ever stop trying to do that?)
Archaic, and arguably exactly what you would expect from a good corporate psychopath.
Anyone could guess that this sort of thing was likely to happen. Google are doing it by default now. Another example is Microsoft's Office 365, but that's not dictating terms  to anyone, yet.
Throwing down the gauntlet is a challenge to fight. This seems to be nothing like that. It is arguably anti-trust, oligopolistic or monopolistic practice. They don't expect a fight.
1448  Main Area and Open Discussion / Living Room / Re: New PC double-take on: May 07, 2013, 12:54:14 AM
@40hz: Oh, thanks for that. That's very informative.
I wondered why new PCs would come loaded with proprietary 3rd party DVD players - since XP days. I usually found them lacking or they wanted money to upgrade to a version that actually did anything useful. So I tended to not use them, preferring to use (for example) VLC, Winamp or Real Alternative. Nowadays I usually just use VLC and nothing else, and I continue to disable Windows Media Player because of its DRM functionality and because it tries to call home - I block it at the firewall too, just in case. (A pity to not use MS MP, as it  has a good database system.)

I was interested in Win8, because MS has apparently cunningly embedded some cross-integration with MSO 2013 + Win8 + IE10 + SkyDrive + Outlook.com), so you don't necessarily get the whole ball of wax unless you upgrade to all the latest versions of these things. It's called "lock-in" I guess, but it is cunningly done with a velvet glove, though the proverbial iron fist is probably inside that glove.
SharePoint users have this issue in spades, as SharePoint is (deliberately) incredibly well-integrated with MSO, IE and the Win OS, but you have to have all the latest versions of everything to be able to use all the latest functionality. On a treadmill for life, paying a tollgate fee to MS as you rotate.
Anyway, I still have MSO as an incentive to migrate to Win8, but the disincentives seem to include the sorts of thing you mentioned above, and others - e.g., the dropping of ClearType functionality (ergonomics is kind of important).
1449  Main Area and Open Discussion / Living Room / Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content] on: May 06, 2013, 10:58:30 PM
^^ I didn't get the joke until I googled "Yakov Smirnoff".
Never heard of him before. He's very clever/funny.

e.g., from: Wikiepedia Yakov Smirnoff
Russian reversal
Russian reversal or "In Soviet Russia" is a type of joke originated by Smirnoff, and is an example of antimetabole.[5] The general form of the "In Soviet Russia" joke is that the subject and object of a statement are reversed, and "In (Soviet) Russia," or something equivalent, is added, and the verb is often left unconjugated and articles are omitted, mimicking perceived Russian-accented speech. The original was:

    In America, you can always find a party.
    In Soviet Russia, Party always find you!

Other examples include:

    In America, you break law.
    In Soviet Russia, law breaks you!

    In America, your work determines your marks.
    In Soviet Russia, Marx determines your work!

    In America, you assassinate presidents.
    In Soviet Russia, presidents assassinate you!

    In America, you watch Big Brother.
    In Soviet Russia, Big Brother watches you!

Smirnoff's use of English allowed him to smooth over grammar differences in transitioning from the setup to the punchline. For example, he omits the articles "a" and "the" (which the Russian language doesn't have) in the first reversal joke above, to better preserve the congruence. Also, verbs are often left unconjugated, such as in the joke "In America, you listen to man on radio. In Soviet Russia, man on radio listen to you!"

In 1985, Smirnoff appeared on a Miller Lite commercial featuring Russian reversal jokes.[6]

    In America, there's plenty of light beer and you always find a party. In Russia, Party will always find you.

See also: Transpositional pun
1450  Main Area and Open Discussion / Living Room / Re: silly humor - post 'em here! [warning some NSFW and adult content] on: May 06, 2013, 08:52:44 AM
Illuminated script.
A new monk arrived at a monastery.  He was assigned to help the other monks in copying the old illuminated texts by hand.  He noticed however, that they were copying from copies, and not the original manuscripts held in the scriptorium.  So he went to Father Florian (the Armarius of the Scriptorium) to ask him about this.  He pointed out that if there was an error in the first copy, then that error would be continued in all of the other copies.

Father Florian said, "The monks of this monastery have been copying from the copies for centuries, but you make a good point, my son. I shall check on this right now."

So saying, Father Florian went down into the cellar with one of the copies to check it against the original.  Hours went by and nobody saw him come back up.  Eventually, one of the monks went downstairs to look for him.  He heard sobbing coming from the back of the cellar, and found the old monk leaning on a table, on which were open the copy and the original manuscript.  The old man was crying.

The monk said to Father Florian, "What's wrong father?"

The old monk replied in a choked voice, "The word is 'celebrate'! "
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