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I was just thinking along those lines.

@4wd: excellent feedback.  I'll make the edits tomorrow.

No. I've changed those to metric: the spaceship isn't 2 miles in diameter,  it's 3.2 km. Zuzana's staff isnt 7 foot, its (roughly) 1.75 meters.

Thanks 4wd and Perry. Your noted areas of concern have been addressed and will be reflected in future uploads. The locals in the Land of Kyrathaba environment/reality use a length of measurement they call a lambit, which is equal to 46 cm. When trying to explain smaller distances, somehow compare it to a fraction of a lambit, by estimating how many of those lengths would have to be connected to equal a lambit. Convoluted and archaic, right? When discussing walking/traveling distances, they discuss the Greater Lambit, which is equal to 1,000 lambits.
Within the context of the Earth environment in the book (non-Kyrathaba reality), I'll stick with metric.

1. How many forum members/visitors are reading this work? I know about 40hz, 4wd, and Perry Mowbray. Anyone else?

2. Who is your favorite male character? Favorite female character?

3. Favorite scene so far in the book (up through end of Ch. 10)

For the convenience of proof-readers who may not want to have to keep downloading epub or mobi files, I've added a link to the entire book online, in html format. This is the link, and it's also found in the OP.

So where is the app that is going to come out of this regarding the facilitation of exchange and management of change suggestions in written works?

Microsoft Word in mark-up mode?

Although I know what you mean, ewemoa. Why don't you code it for NANY 2014?

[now".]

I was only bolding for emphasis here on the board. It's not bolded in the book.

Basically, I was trying to show the difference between this:

now".

and this...

now."

[now”.]

“Thanks,” said Sethra. “That will be all for now”.

becomes

“Thanks,” said Sethra. “That will be all for now.”

There was one too many commas in the following sentence, but it has been modified below so that I think it flows correctly:

There are things going on that may ultimately benefit us, perhaps even gain us victory over the aliens.


Also corrected a confusing bit by replacing it with that shown below:

The group sat in a tavern within the town that styled itself “The Prancing Unicorn”. Byron, a fan of Tolkienn, had just about doubled-over when he’d seen the painted sign outside the establishment. Now, they sat sipping smooth, cold, refreshing ale. Byron said, “Come on, Sethra, admit it. ‘The Prancing Unicorn’? It has to be an in-joke among your programming team, a nod to The Hobbit’s ‘Prancing Pony’ in Bree."
“My lips are sealed” said Sethra, and grinned.

Added closing quotation mark to phrase: Dr. Jaimie Ericson, Chief of Earth Sciences, and head of this ongoing development.

Chapter 10 has been written. See original post for zip archive containing the EPUB and MOBI ebook files.

[a]

In chapter 9, correcting this:

“By orcs, or a perhaps a band of ogres,” Sethra answered nonchalantly.


to this:

“By orcs, or perhaps a band of ogres,” Sethra answered nonchalantly.

[to my implant memory. He chimed the doctor]

In chapter 9, correcting this:

Jaimie's report was quite detailed, and he was quite hungry. "Computer, transfer a copy of current report to my implant memory. He chimed the doctor...

to this (adding closing quotation mark):

Jaimie’s report was quite detailed, and he was quite hungry. “Computer, transfer a copy of current report to my implant memory.” He chimed the doctor

[about well over]

Early Ch. 8:

Edited "If we're able to continue at this rate, we can be at a depth of about well over 1,000 meters below the entrance to Main Channel Two in another ... oh ... make it nine days."

changing the above to:

If we’re able to continue at this rate, we can be at a depth of 1,000 meters below the entrance to Main Channel Two in another ... oh ... make it nine days.

[site]

In Chapter 1, I have corrected the following sentence to appear as shown below:

Damned shame previous generations didn’t dig and build a site deeper than this. This will appear in next upload.

In particular, you guys may want to download and give a re-read to Chapters 8 and 9. I've changed nothing in Prologue up through end of Chapter 7.

Perry's find:

Chapter 9
Page 18.44 "He’s ? most as the author of the classic high fantasy works The Hobbit, The Lord of the Rings, and The Silmarillion." missing "remembered"?

has been addressed thusly:

Zuzana’s eyes momentarily lost focus as if she were in thought, then she smiled. In a didactic tone, she supplied, “Orcs are a race of mythical humanoid creatures, generally described as brutish, aggressive and repulsive, stemming from the writings of J. R. R. Tolkien, where orcs contrast with the benevolent Elvish race. Tolkienn was a writer, poet, philologist, and professor who lived from 1882 to 1973 in England. He’s most often known as the author of the classic high fantasy works The Hobbit, The Lord of the Rings, and The Silmarillion.”
She laughed. “This is great!”

@Perry: a closing quotation mark was added to this sentence: But don’t get any wild ideas about making any unauthorized jaunts into these tunnels, crevices or pools.

I'm posting up a new revision of the novel, through the end of Ch. 9. It contains some corrections of my own, as well as implementations of corrections and suggestions made by Perry and 4wd, to date. The upload is entitled "KR_Perry_4wd.zip".

Thanks, Perry. All those corrections will appear in next upload, with Ch. 10.

Only one vast lake in their ship, so made changes to reflect that.

light-years ago changed to light-years away

Perry, just saw your post. Your correction will be incorporated into the next upload, probably when Ch. 10 is added. Thank you!

Thanks, 4wd. Addressed every single one of your excellent points. Converted all measurements to metric.

Uploaded all your suggested corrections, plus the ones I've found for Chapters 8 and 9 and shown in recent posts. Newly corrected manuscript is uploaded as "Kyrathaba Rising.zip"

In Chapter 9:


toward western        becomes:        toward the western

would be much         becomes:         would be too much

he began to quickly peruse the report, but soon food was forgotten.           becomes:            He began to quickly peruse the report, and soon food was forgotten.

somebody gets lots in the forest       becomes:        somebody gets lost in the forest

a corrected sentence becomes: He’s most often known as the author of the classic high fantasy works The Hobbit, The Lord of the Rings, and The Silmarillion.”

Early in Ch. 8, "would be spend" will be corrected to "would we spend"

“Understood, the administrator replied...    will be corrected to:      “Understood,” the administrator replied.

nature of the alien’s technology           will be corrected to:          nature of the aliens’ technology

said Sethra with conviction. I have            will be corrected to:               said Sethra with conviction. “I have




someday wormholes may not just allow humans to traverse vast galactic distances instantaneously; they may also

will be corrected to:

someday wormholes may not just allow humans to traverse vast galactic distances instantaneously. They may also




could prevent insanity. Experimentation over the past thirty years     will become:     could prevent insanity: experimentation over the past thirty years

Ok, full steam ahead, then 

Uploaded new archive containing up through end of Chapter 9.

@k - looks like you're running your very own private NaNoWriMo with this one. Grin

Keep going! Don't break the rhythm since you're apparently in the zone right now. We're all behind you 100%. Thmbsup

Much appreciated, 40hz